Im Scared :(

I dont know my status yet. And im afraid coz i think im +. Afraid to take the test for the result. Yesterday was my birthday but its not happy that how it used to be. I experience fever chill 3 days ago everynight before my birthday. That was the 2nd week i have unprotected sex. Im afraid coz this is the first time im freaking out, cant sleep at night. Cant focus on my job and the most of it i cried most of the time till now. I think im going insanse if i find out im +. I dont where to go if ever. Im just new here in US and not established yet. I dont know if i can afford the treatment. I dont know if my family still accept me in their house. Im jut livig with my aunts house. Im afraid i need help and advise. I prayed evey day and night coz only God that one i can talk to about it.

I read a lot of the stories online and good thing i found this site. Sometimes it helps me ease the stress im having. But still im afraid. :(
Sailingalone Sailingalone
22-25, M
3 Responses Jun 20, 2012

@regreter1 im afraid how am i goig to continue. Theres anlot of question in me like treatment. How can i afford everything. And my family. I dot know what to do. Im scared :( i need help for someone to talk to

@ Sailingalone.To start with you not even sure if you are hiv+.An secondly you won't know what's on the other side until you get on the other side.Like i said,do the test,and worry about all these things afterwards,when you sure about your status.You'll be surprised how easy things may turn out.

@regreter1 yeah i did the test and they said the accurate test will be threee after exposure to the virus.

Im kind of really afraid right now. No one knows about what problems i hve now. And i read a lot things about hiv. I was shocked about costnof treatment and everything.

And thanks for being there. I dont have someone to talk to about this. :(

It's normal to be afraid.But unfortunately somethings have to be done.Atleast you took the 1st step.That's good.I guess you'll have to wait that three months to be sure if you infected or not yeah!Try not to stress too much hey!Stress is one thing that make the cd4 cells decrease quicky,and make it quick for a person to get Aids.That's if you are infected.Take care.By the way where are you situated in this big world of us?If you don't mind me asking!

I'm in the same boat. I have swollen lymph nodes in neck armpit. I too am scared however I have to wait to test. I will remember you in my prayers.

If you need to talk then let me know cause I sure do.

But i can feel im infected.

For now im reading a book so i can divert my attention. But everytime im alone it flashed back to the point im going to cry infront of my customers at work. I cant baerely focus my self to work. Sigh*

im trying to eat a lot right now. I want to make myself healthy again. Coz the last few weeks i lost my appetite from the things ive read online like others are left untreated coz if money. That makes me scared.

Uhm in north carolina. How about u?

Im sorry to hear that. Ill include u to my prayers too.

How are u feeling?

Me i just dont know where am i gonna go or how im goin to live of i found out. :( im scared

Hey guys,just be strong and positive(about life).In time you'll see that things are not as bad as they seem.There's always light at the of the tunnel.Everything is going to fine,you'll see.It really not as bad as is seems.I've been there and i know.BE BLESSED.

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Knowing your status is the best thing you can do for yourself.Whether the results come out pos or neg.Because you'll atleast know where you standing,and where to go from there.I was scared too,but under circumstances,i had to test.Results came back pos,and now i know my status,that i'm pos,i made peace with it,and life goes on.Hiv is longer a killer desease like it used to be long ago.There's life after hiv.So,just find out about where to go for tests,and do it.Goodluck!

Getting my result on July 13th. I was like friday the 13th?? Im scared. :(