What Can I Say?

My story is so similar to many that I am reading here. I have been happily married for 17 yrs to a wonderful man and have 2 great children. I work part time and at 46 feel like I am in the best shape of my life. With the kids in school, my husband working and my job only part time I have a lot of free time on my hands. For the first time in my life I started having an affair 3 months ago with a married man I have known for a couple of years. His kids are at school with mine and he and I both volunteer there. He is a generous well respected person in our community and has been happily married for many years...he is my age. Although we are both happily married it is obvious that both our married sex lives were not meeting our needs. The affair started unexpectedly after we happenened to be at the same restaurant one night with respective friends and no spouses. We both had been drinking a bit and began flirting alot. The next day we began texting...sexting really, every day for a couple of weeks until we finally got together at a hotel. I have to say that I loved the sexting and the multiple daily messages I would get from him before we actually got together...he was in hot pursuit and really let me know it!. The sex has been amazing and uninhibited. We also have developed a great open dialogue where I feel like I can talk about anything with him...he seems to be the same with me. We are completely relaxed around each other. We try to get together as often as possible, which is about every two weeks or so but we live in a very small town and travel in the same social circles so it makes getting together very difficult. Sometimes a hotel...sometimes one of our houses. My issues is that since we have been having sex most of the texting has stopped. I can go days without hearing from him. He is sweet and caring when he does check
in but it is nothing like it was before. I am trying to separate the emotion and give him the space he needs. He has a very successful business and serves on several Boards so I know he is super busy and needs to be discreet. I have lots of free time so I think that is part of my issue. If I contact him he is good about getting back to me but not always in the same playful tone that he used to have. I am probably wasting too much time thinking about him and getting anxious about not hearing from him daily. I certainly do not want this to end right now and know that he wants it to continue. At the risk of sounding needy and high maintenance I have not brought up the subject of communicating more...maybe I should. This is my first time at this and I have to say having this great sex without any expectation of breaking up our families has made life happier for me. It is sometimes unsettling...like a roller coaster ride. I plan to ride it out for now and see what happens
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May 12, 2012