The Guy At Work...part 4. the End.

This will be my final entry.  This website has been a great outlet for a lot of feelings that I have bottled up inside me and have been unable to share.

The truth is that affairs and lust will ruin your life.  I was not caught and I doubt that I ever will.  However, my experience as an cheater has changed me.

My affair has ended on my terms which feels good.  However, the heartbreak that I feel is too much to bear.  I am done with it all.

Where did it all go wrong.  I feel in love with the man that I was just supposed to ****.

I realized that he really does not care for me and was only using me.  It is not ok but to be honest I can't complain, I allowed it.

I am done with all of it.  I am done thinking that the grass is greener on the other side.  The grass is fine on my side.  It is as green as it will ever be.

My heart aches and for what.  For man who would never trully love me.  What was I thinking that he would leave his wife and child and that I would leave my husband and that the two of us would live happily ever after.  Ha!

 

deleted deleted
26-30
1 Response Feb 19, 2009

I agree with Wilber999, it sounds like you're missing something in your marriage for you to have had the affair to begin with. I am currently having an affair and I know all that's missing in my marriage. I just can't leave my husband. My lover provides me with what I am missing good sex, excitement, fantasy, intellectual stimulation and intrigue. But that is where I draw the line. My lover is married also. It's hard not to get too deep emotionally but you have to set strong limits and you both comply. <br />
Luckily I have found that with my friend/lover.