I Don't Want To Be Known By My Birth Name

~ due to technical difficulties (also read as protest to EP's partnership with Facebook) this story has been temporarily removed ~
Areyan Areyan
6 Responses Jul 10, 2010

thank you all again for being so supportive. i even find it difficult visiting this page because it triggers something to read about it. it means a lot that others know how something like this feels. thank you all and hugs back to you all as well. i hope we all have much more rewarding life experiences ahead of us in the future though, lol. i will post comment here again when i get some therapy as well, hopefully i can give someone else some good pointers if they're stuck too.<br />
<br />
rollingwithhusky, i'm so pleased to hear things are changing for the better for you. great to see you feeling good about the positives. keep on doing that, it's great to have friends who are marching ahead to catch up to. :D<br />
<br />
big hugs back

I'm so sorry that you've gone through so much. I can fully understand why you're having issues with identity, using your name. It's as if all the suffering is connected to your identity, your name just re-enforces the PTSD. It can actually be a trigger. <br />
<br />
I hope you're able to feel better about yourself and your history, as you continue moving forward on your journey. I don't know about other people, but I'm finally starting to accept and move forward, after several decades of being removed from the worst of the abuse. For a while I thought it would never happen, but I'm starting to see some changes in myself that I'm pleased with. <br />
<br />
Love & Hugs

I went through almost the same kind of issues. Trust me you are headed for a nervous breakdown. Get help any way you can. You cannot take care of your children if you yourself are sick. Children see much more than you know. I hope for your sake and your children's sake that you get help immediatly. The brain works in mysterious way to handle stress that you have just gone through. There is support out there you have to want to find it. Poverty sucks but you have to face reality. Do not hook up with any other men. They cannot help you. Oh and by the way when the children are in bed have a nice bath a glass of cheap wine and tell yourself I'm a damn good person. And keep doing it till you believe it.

You are very welcome... please stay in touch... it really helps to have someone talk to...

thank you both for your kind words, i am seeking therapy for these issues and hoping to see my therapist soon. i am using the public health system so it will take awhile... it helps to know there are others out there who care. thank you both very much.

I am very sorry for your pain, and the horrific things you have been forced to endure. The very fact that you did endure them, did win custody of your children, did soldier on in the face of such misery, proves that you are very strong and determined. <br />
<br />
Having your partner chose to change gender is no small thing, and you are doing your best to roll with the punches, Is therapy an option for you?<br />
<br />
I'm not surprised you are suffering identity issues... your world is constantly changing without any consideration for who you are. I have fought many battles with change and abuse, and it does help to get support here from people who understand.<br />
<br />
However, I have sought out professional help when I couldn't think my way past the pain, and I think you are there.<br />
<br />