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My Two Bad Experiences

I had two incidents with friends, though both happened when I was small, which still stays. My father and grandma (his mother in law) were never in talking terms ever since I could remember. So during my childhood I had a pretty bad time with them both venting their anger on each other on me. Every time there is a family gathering, all my grandma wanted to do was to make fun of me. That left me with spending all my time with six friends I had around my house. Soon they became my happiness, my world, my everything. They used to come to my house every day and we had a great time together. We get 2 months holidays during summer and I was eagerly waiting for that to come, so that I could spend all the day with them.
I was detected of hip jointed disintegration and since it got worse, it needed surgery to put metal plate and had to remain on bed for some months plastered. I came back from the hospital when the vacation just started and all I wanted was to see my friends. I waited counting days in agony only to hear their all day long jubilation from the other side of the wall against the window in my room. All that separated us was the wall, I waited for days for any of them to look over that wall or walk through my gate and smile at me once, just once. Though my parents got me help to take care of me, she always spends the days with the other maid in my house. I was crying all the time and after a month I got into kind of mental trauma and all I wanted was to forget them all. I got some complications with anesthesia during the surgery, the first one did n’t work or so, so had to get me another.
And my father believed that is what messed with my memory of past 6 years and still believes that. No, it was this that caused that. After 2 months my parents got shifted and I never saw any of them again.. That affected me and I stayed to myself for some time. I took excuse of my physical condition to stay away from people and attended the school next year only to write exams and got private tuition. Slowly I got over that and some years later I became friend with a boy just 2 years elder to me, who was my neighbor. We used to play cricket together and I had a pretty big collection of balls, rubber ones, cork ones, tennis balls, Chinese rubber etc. I treated them like my family.There was a deserted property separated by a big wall against the place where we played. While we played he used to hit them over the wall and every time I asked to go searching, he prevented me saying there were snakes there. This continued for almost 2 months till, I was shocked to see one day, actually all of my balls were with him. He cheated me. I got sad and just asked him why he did so, to my bad luck.
Next thing he, his siblings and cousins got physical on me. They beat me up real real bad and threw me out. I got bruises all over. Ok, I thought someone whom I trusted like my brother just cheated me, beat me up, and it was all over.
Two days later when I returned from school they threw stones at me. I got hit and drew blood. After that though I lived there for 2 more years, we hardly met and had no more interactions. I did not tell both the incidents to my parents, as all that would do is my father getting angry about why I first friend him.
But getting stoned affected me badly, and my sadness gave way to anger, hatred and vengeance. All I wanted was to kill him and I spend the evenings of almost a month searching for a snake in the deserted property, so that I can get him killed, but I never found one. I even set a trap for the snakes, but it did not happen. Nothing happened, nothing….. That is the bad boy I was or may be i am still, am i??
anathema09 anathema09 22-25, M 8 Responses Nov 13, 2012

Your Response


:'( :'(

I am sorry to read this...I hope your health is better now...I never quite understood why someone would hurt you just for the sake of playing with were being a good friend and they have been mean to you. And truely they are not your friends if they left you alone or hurt you..Life is full of experiences and what matters is what we learn from it...and I hope you have good friends.

oh :( bad time has gone bro.. now only good things will happen . :)

everyone will hav got a time they pay for their deeds
and everyone wont stay sad for ever
let ur days ahead bring u lot of happiness

Thanks for your kind words.

Had somewhat a similar experience as a kid

The friends u made were carefree of ur feelings,
they might not have felt the same love for u as u felt for them,
u had a void in ur life that u were trying to fill with their friendship,
it didn't work and u took it to ur heart, more over u r a sensitive person so the pain still lasts,
the second person who cheated on u must be quite a materialistic person but u can't blame him cause he was just a kid back then plus he didn't thought of those balls as his family like u,
they all might regret it now, for all u know they might have even moved on with or without the regrets,
its time u do the same, remembring these sort of things over n over again would get u no where but it will only keep u from seeing the present,
make sure that u don't miss out the people around u, who are true to u and really love u for who u are.

Don't let ur past prevail ur present!

Stay happy! :)

Just that it stay, the lesson stay, and not the people. After all I got beaten up real bad to be true.
Again, there are other issues that eclipse this, both good and bad ones..:)
Thanks for your valuable time and kind comments.

Actually ur experience is, been there, done that, sort of situation for me.

It took u 2 months to figure out that u were being cheated, it took me 5 years to figure that out and about 2 years to get over that feeling, i missed out many good moments of life because i was too caught up in the past and self pity, hope the same doesn't happen to u :)

Good Luck!

Life is full of ups and downs.u dont need to be put down by situations that took place in the have a life ahead of you and bitterness want Help have to let go of all pain and need to love,be happy and forgive.

Thanks for your kind words, i appreciate that.

Kids can be really nasty but people change, So don't be angry with them, Who knows maybe they regret what they did to you.

My Friend we think that what we are is because of what happened to us but we forget we always had a choice, What you are is because you choose yourself to be this way. Yes Events effect us but still we can choose how we are on the inside nothing can break you, Unless you give up hope.

I accept who i am and try to be a better person, I hope you do that too :)

Take Care

thanks for your kind words, what i miss is people like you. Very much appreciated.
Good luck bro,