I am anonymous. I'm not outgoing, I'm very quiet and trust few people. I have clinical depression. I have had it for about 10 months. I can't even fall asleep without crying. I have flashbacks that seem real and sometimes they make me sick. I used o be a happy, normal teenage girl. I was on the cheer squad and loved to dance. My grades weren't always the best but I passed.
Then I met him. As you read, the title of this story is them. Well this "him" is one of them. I know it's confusing, just try to comprehend it. Well, he was older than me but only by one year. He was held back when he was in kindergarten so he was stuck in my grade. I was 14 when I met him. So yes, he was 15 at the time. Well I became close friends with him the night I saved his life. I stopped him from killing himself. After that day, we were inseperable. He started to flirt with me, a lot. I didn't want that, I just wanted a friend. Well, he wanted more. I went to see him on Christmas Eve because his mom wouldn't be there and I didn't want him to have to be alone. Well, I started crying because I missed my mom so he did what any good friend would've done, he held me and let me cry. Well, he laid me down on his bed and I didn't think he was going to hurt me, because I was still crying my eyes out. Well, I was wrong. He started kissing me and I tried to stop him, that's when he shoved me down onto the bed. He started trying to take my clothes off and I fought but couldn't stop him. He raped me.
Because he was such a good friend, I didn't tell anyone. It continued happening and I suffered in silence. He would touch me in public and I wouldn't do anything because of the fear of him hitting me. He would do everything he could to get me alone.
The molesting and raping went on for 4 months before I finally told my mom. She took me to a different school and we moved out of state. I was happy at my new school. Until him.
He was nice, very sweet, and cared about me. We started off as friends and we slowly began to date. One day, he was walking me home and we stopped at the city park. I knew he wanted to kiss me. So I let him kis me, but then he started trying to put his hands up my shirt. I wasn't ready for anything like that. I pulled his hands away but he didn't want to stop. He then tried to remove my pants. I wasn't going to let this happen again. So I started trying to push him off and did everything I could. He wasn't done with me just yet. That's when he removed all of my clothing. He hit me multiple times in the process. He then removed his pants and boxers and forced me to give him a hand job. I started screaming and crying and he left me there.
I am now dating a boy who I know will never hurt me. He really does care and I've seen his true colors. He is helping me get over them. But sadly, I don't think I'll ever be able to forget them.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 7, 2013