In the last year and a half my whole life has done a 180, I was going to church on Sundays, I was working two full times jobs, living on my own, had a great guy but also had another guy who I was previously living with because we were dating and him and his family took me and and raised me for 4 years. But I never seemed to fit in there, The great guy his name is Austin, His family was very religious, wealthy and their family was all very close. To them I was an outcast because I wasn't raised the way were, I came from a completely non believers in god, unwealthy family. And the family who raised me for 4 years were pot heads and rich as well. So I just felt I never fit in, I was never rich and feel like I never would be.

So I left where I was living to go visit my family up north, and while I was up there I ran into a guy I knew and dated in middle school, well we hit it off and something inside me said I needed to move up here with this guy. So I just up and dropped my jobs, my house the guys and everything from where I was living packed and moved all in 2 weeks and no one knew why and I was afraid to tell anyone why because I knew they wouldn't agree with it.

So I moved up here and 9 days after re-meeting this guy and he proposed. It felt right to say yes so I did, then 4 months later we were married and I was happy but filled with regret because of how I left everyone and no one knew what was going on in my current life. 5 months later I found out I was pregnant. I am now currently 6 months pregnant with a son. Still married and happy with the man I married and don't get me wrong I love him, It's just no know knows why I left or what is going on in my current life.

The worst thing is I miss all those people because I may not have meant much to them but they meant a lot to me. And I want to be like Austin's mom, I want to raise my kids the way she did her's. I want her to be my role model but I cant have that, I can't talk to her again and if i show my face or life near them again I just feel like it will be a disaster.
Lacy527 Lacy527
22-25, F
Aug 19, 2014