Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

Think Globally, Act Locally

Honesty is about so much more than just telling the truth. 

In defense of a greater truth, I have lied, deceived, and evaded.  It goes without saying that I feel my reasons sufficient; I do feel a bit of distaste for the perceived necessity of such a course of action. 

I know who I am, what I stand for...  and I know that there are situations which would force me into the mould of another's ideal, and that keeping clear of that morass of superficial morality and condescension is ultimately more important to me than giving exact and accurate information to those who feel they have a right to know.

I am preserving my self.  Possibly, I am preserving my self at the cost of my soul, but I guess when that balance falls even, I will have found a place in which I can calmly lie down and die.

RascallyRabbit RascallyRabbit 31-35, F 16 Responses Apr 24, 2011

Your Response

Cancel

I have felt this way for along time you get to say what i'm thinking I like it lol

yeah, woobs, i kind of figured you'd be willing to go to lengths. = ) and my mom's all right. takes years to grow into acceptance, though. i'm really glad we're friends now.

thank you jimmy. my family had that conversation, about whether or not you would steal if you were starving. My father and my sister both felt that there are certain things you decide ahead of the event. That their sense of integrity demanded that under n o circumstances would they steal, so they wouldn't allow it to be an option. I said that I would have to leave room for the possibility because what if people were depending on me? I would be proud to steal for a child in my care, though I might not for myself. My mother.. remained silent. Which was as much as she could do to support my view, since her husband had already stated he would not honour a thief. So there ya go, jimmy. You're almost family now! * grin *

Good stuff.

In the end, it's not about honesty, but about righteousness... because who is to label a thief as such when that thief has stolen to feed his family?<br />
What we see as "honesty" is often the selfish notion of wanting to be treated fairly with total disregard of the circumstances and the consequences.<br />
Are you honest, RabbitRichards? Who cares... because you ARE righteous...!!<br />
So, in my book you are honest too.

Awww, woobie, you always seem to find the words that go straight to the heart of any issue. You see all the depth and priceless ways of bunny because I think, you share most, if not all those qualities with her.....:)

ba<x>sementsong, what an awesome comment. Thanks for posting! You remind me of the difference between a man and his deeds. I can be very harshly judgemental of myself, feeling like the sum total of my actions is all of that on which might ba<x>se an opinion of me. Thank you for the reminder that intention matters. I do believe that.

so, sierra, i've been thinking about what you said here. it only looked like I forgot to come back. = )<br />
I was thinking about a girl I knew when I was in college. She had had a difficult childhood, and when your major is Massage Therapy, you're likely to have to face more than a few demons. And she was one of those people who felt she would be disloyal to " her truth " if she didn't voice it. All the time. Out loud. No matter the audience. If I had ever been tempted to act in that way before, she doused that desire. It was astounding to watch the devastation. Emotional flotsam, spewed like little bits of shrapnel from her internal explosions. Terrifying.<br />
<br />
tommy, again you say in 3 lines what it takes me a page to deliver. thank you.<br />
<br />
LyNz, you are so supportive. Your comments are like the quick hug from that special aunt, reassuring, but never cloying. Thank you.<br />
<br />
woobs, thanks so much. I'm always working on improving my writing, and your comments help me get better. As to protecting my people, I'm very definitely the warrior in my clan. Preserving my self is just .. sanity.

OK, it's either the truth, or it isn't. There is no thin line there. One of the few areas of ideology that is truly black and white. Sorry Lynz46, but you cannot just make your own definition of truth.<br />
<br />
If I build a doghouse, does that make me a carpenter? No. Neither does telling a lie, make me a liar.<br />
There are direct lies, lies of omission and half truths. All are lies... all can cause or create as much harm as the other.<br />
<br />
Then there's this thing called, "the brutal truth". My wife, (ex) once came to me after shopping all day, and had this pie-eatin' smile on her face, walked up, stuck out her foot and said, "How do you like my new shoes?" OK, these things were hideous! I'm no slave to fashion or anything, but I know hideous when I see it. I look into those bright, happy eyes and see the joy she has in these shoes. However, I was such a stickler for the truth, yet didn't want to dash her hopes, so the best I could come up with was: "Well, they're festive!" These were shoes a drunk monkey wouldn't wear!<br />
There was a moment in time that I wish I could have back... get a 'do-over'. Her feelings were hurt for no 'greater truth', no superior principle... for no reason. Next time, those are going to be the best looking shoes I've ever seen!!!<br />
<br />
Lighten up folks... we're all liars and hypocrites to an extent. OK, then, I speak only for myself... I am! That's reality. That's real and who I am. I no longer hold me or anyone else accountable for "the truth and nothing but the truth". The distinction, I believe, with some folks is, that they try to take a lie, and somehow twist it into the truth by some reasoning that fits them or their agenda.<br />
If I lie, I own it! It's mine, and I admit it and move on. Sometimes it's necessary to go to the person I've lied to and make amends for it. In most cases, if it's something that another has asked, and is not their business, I am usually quick to tell them that their question is inappropriate. But not always. Sometimes I don't have the courage at the moment, so I lie.<br />
<br />
I've come to find, that holding myself to impossibly high standards, makes me bitter and remorseful.<br />
It also makes me a very judgmental and hypocritical human being because I hold others to my standards too. Standards I myself cannot keep!

thank you, mindlessdaydreamer. I appreciate your well wishes. <br />
<br />
Lots of people lie for such flimsy reasons... I think I agree with you that there are reasons to feel... if not guiltless, then at least ...* searches for words *... virtuous?

Just saying: I have lied - to protect my job, necessary to support my family. I have lied to protect myself from divorce - didn't work. But, is it lying to pick and choose the small truths to say and avoid the small truths that might hurt?

Honesty and it's use and importance is a very personal subject and a highly subjective one at that. If everyone walked around spouting "their truth" all the time, chaos would ensue.... <br />
Everyone has a different set of truths. The above poster has his/her truth and I have a different one. I see Rabbit as a person with enough compassion, intellect and heart to NOT pour HER every truth on others. I think it's good to share as much as one can with the right folks but I also see a need to NOT pour it all over everyone. That's when One person's truth becomes another persons pain....

you're right Tsunami. I'm a liar. I have no right. In fact, why don't we rip all of the bandages off right now? I can tell my family all the things about me that would hurt them, and I can even tell them things they have no right or need to know. <br />
<br />
Now, as to greater truths, I would be showing myself to be unloving, disloyal, and careless with the delicate hearts that choose me upon whom to depend, but that's ok. I can sleep really well knowing I've been honest. What they experience as a result of my unvarnished truth-telling isn't really my fault, right?<br />
<br />
I realize I've been a little bit harsh and sarcastic in my answer, so I want to say this: I really appreciate your comment, and I'm glad you're willing to talk about it. But once you got to " It's obviously not such a priority to you, " this comment became a personal attack.

You don't fit my definition of honest. To me, honesty is more important than any "greater truth" that you might lie to protect, or any family members that you might hurt. It's obviously not such a priority to you.

right on fetish, and I rather wish I could. Sorry about the words... I get precise when I get stressed. I appreciate what you've said. There are still too many people I could hurt ( read: " too many family members yet living " ) for me to live openly.

First, let me say that although I understood what you were saying, I had to look up several words in the dictionary to fully appreciate it. You are obviously an intelligent person.<br />
<br />
Any decent person should have a distaste when feeling compelled to express themselves by the use of deception, evasion and down right lying. Having said that, It is your recognition of that, that makes you feel better. Far too many times I have expressed myself, or not expressed myself in a way that is true to the person I am.<br />
<br />
If your soul is suffering in the end anyway, why not go out with a bang. I would think it is very agonizing to preserve yourself at the cost of your soul.