When I Was Called a Liar
In 2005 my life came crashing down. It seemed as if everything had ended. I guess I have already shared the reason for that in my other stories. The one thing that collapsed totally was my academic status. I have always been studious. Before 2005 I was nothing but a geek. I was always lost in finding something new in his books. And my hard work usually paid. I never lost my top rank in my school. I was so focused on every small thing that mattered to me. But after ’05 everything changed. In my first two years of Engineering I had a near hundred percent attendance. After ’05, for the next two years, I must have not attended my classes for over a year. Not to mention my scores nose dived by well over forty percent. Life changing things happen and one is left with no other option but to redraw everything from scratch. There are a few moments that I can never forget; specially the ones involving my professor. Because of my loss of interest my teachers too became ambivalent to help me in any way. I never told any one at the university what had really happened. Partly because no one knew her and partly because no one would understand what she meant for me. I had just one close friend at the university with whom I shared almost everything. But I never talked about my relations with him. So friends, if they were friends, at first tolerated me and then eventually just gave up. It was all because of my professor that they allowed me to remain in the group project. Had it not been for him they would have probably thrown me out of that as well. Not that I could complain. I had not attended college for months. I had no clue what was going on. I know anyone reading this would blame me for not communicating properly. But I was really in no condition to tell people what happened. All I wanted to do was run away, anywhere, but away from her memories. I didn’t feel the need to tell people that there was a genuine problem.
If I go back to my college now, every face in the staff room will turn sour. They all hate me. And they have reasons to. My professor on the other hand is perhaps the only man who saw beyond what seemed to be rather obvious. I cleared my course because of him. Fortunately for me God has given me some brains so I managed to clear my papers by studying six months portion in just 24 hours. Even today I can’t believe that I actually did that. My professor was like my messiah at that time. As per the guidelines we could not answer our papers if we didn’t have the necessary attendance. But he allowed me to answer. Finally on the day I answered my last paper I asked him why he had bent every rule to see me through. He said “Every one remembers you for what you did in the last two years of your course, I remember you for what you did in the first two.” I will never forget that one line. Finally, there was one man who believed in me. I went to the wash room and cried. I will never forget that day. And I will never forget all that he did for me. Now, I want to finish my academic career on a higher note. I don’t want to let him down. I want to get back to what I was. And I want to dedicate it to him. Without him, I would be in a far worse situation than the one I am in right now.
So that brings me to the question of honesty. Most, or rather everyone in my university believed that I was a liar because I never told them anything. So obviously they started hatching their own theories. Again that was plain human. So I really don’t blame anyone. But that mark of being called a liar is something I will carry in my mind forever. And for that reason, now I make a conscious attempt to tell whoever I meet everything about myself. I was always honest. It’s just that now I make my honesty visible. I don’t want to be tagged a liar ever again in my life. Simply because it’s something I am not. I never was, and I hope I never will be.