My So Called Life

It has been bad for a long time. My husband has checked out emotionally, physically... not just on m e but also on life in general. I've written numerous stories in the ILIASM group and also on my blog if you care to know the details.

I don't want to leave him, I hate the thought of divorce. I do still love and care about him. I just don't know what to do. Leaving seems the only option, but I just can't believe that. We both see a psychiatrist, we used to go together but now we go on our own. he goes on Thursday and I go on Friday. Psychiatrist sees that I am being totally mistreated and abused. Is doing his best to help my husband but nothing seems to work. I've recently started on anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medications to help me deal with life at home.

It shouldn't be that way.
marriedintx marriedintx
36-40, F
4 Responses Jul 18, 2010

honey, get out run as fast as you can, he will not change, I've been there, it only compounds'

At this moment my life is exactly the same. Nothing ever changes. He walks around angry 100% of the time. I have been trying to distance myself lately. I have stopped being affectionate and that has been really hard for me. I have been staying over on my side of the bed, faced away from him. I hate it. I usually lay there and cry silently. I don't want him to know I am hurting, he will only use it against me. My distance hasn't had any effect on him whatsoever. He just doesn't care and that is what hurts the most.

How is your life at the moment?<br />
<br />
I care.<br />
<br />

Marriedintx, <br />
Nobody deserves to be mistreated. I know the thought of divorce is scary. I am going through a divorce right now. I will admit, its scary but I will not stay in a marriage where he calls the shots and wants it to be an open marriage, etc. I deserve better and so do you. <br />
I am glad that you are getting help. I started to get help when my marriage fell apart too. There is life after divorce. I see it now.. and I am positive you will see it too. You are still young and can find love again with some one who will treat you right.....<br />
Really think hard about this. You deserve to live again..........