Little Trivialities? Most Would Think...

Last night was Wednesday night, one of our family's busier nights of the week. I took my autistic son to therapy from 4:30 to 5:30. While I am waiting for him to receive his services, I usually do some grocery shopping, and last night was no exception. With so much to get, I barely made it back when his hour was up. But I made it.

As I was driving in backed-up traffic, I remembered my wife saying that we should get dinner in tonight, and as if she was reading my mind, the phone rang. We determined to do KFC for the kids, and we would make healthy salads for ourselves. I went inside to KFC and ordered the kids dinners, getting them combos so they had sides and we could all share the drinks. Well the lady was assembling the order and brought the bag of food to the counter, saying "here you go". I thanked her and went on my merry way.

I arrived home and handed the food to my wife so that I could get at least the perishable groceries in from the car, which also contained our salad we were going to use. As she assembled the kids plates, she inquired to me about the drinks! THE DRINKS!!!

Dammit! I had completely forgotten them since the lady at KFC had also apparently forgotten them. My wife began flipping out at me. I told her it would be okay, I will just go back to get the drinks. She said "Do you know how long that will take you?" It was less than ten minutes each way, so I didn't understand what her big deal was. She continued to mutter things under her breath - insults I am sure. It was really getting annoying hearing the things she was saying, my daughter standing just in the other room, the dining room. I continued to apologize, and said to my wife, "why don't you get salads together for you and Elizabeth, while I run back and get the drinks?" She snapped "I';m not getting anything ready, no ---" and the insults continued to stream out of her mouth. So finally I yelled at her "enough, Sophie - it's over". When I said "it's over", she knew exactly what I meant - that this marriage is over. We have been on the rocks for a few years now, and I have endured many tactics of hers over the years, the latest of which is that she is going to commit suicide whenever we have a major disagreement. There are plenty of examples in my stories, so I am not going to belabor them here, but needless to say - she is back to playing "the suicide game" as I like to call it.

So that's how a seemingly innocent, trivial matter can combust and ignite in my marriage. Our wedding should have come with a referree!  I eventually went to get the drinks immediately after we were done, and then upon my return, had to take my daughter to dance @ 7:30, which is also the same direction as KFC.  I'm sure she was sitting home seething, thinking I had planned this whole snafu to avoid spending time with her.  Afterall, she's so pleasant to be around!  ;-)
ambroseguy80 ambroseguy80
46-50, M
4 Responses Jan 17, 2013

thats touch hun

i dont know why some women get so riled over trivialities

huhs

My wife is the queen of trivial bullshit...

So did you really mean it when you said "it's over"? From your comments below it seems you changed your mind.

Well - of course I really meant it at the time. Then things took an unexpected better turn today - so here I go again like happens in marriage time and again. Did I feel wronged by her treatment? Damn straight! Did I overreact out of complete boiling anger? Probably..... Thanks for asking.

Just trying to figure you out. You seem very unhappy and make these declarations of strong decisions and changes then the next thing I know you are changing your mind. I don't know if you're just angry and saying these things out of anger or if you don't have the balls to actually make a change your life. Or just wishy washy...I don't get you.

I definitely view these posts as a journal of my feelings, and eventually there may be a time of just not being able to give it one more try - I definitely type these out of anger, and I'm definitely unhappy about certain things, but some positive things did happen today that I wasn't really able to provide

Whats to say???...hang in there, ! well pal............... I think you've done your time and more..!! you've done you're best.....take action now and take the good legal action route..and best of luck you deserve better...Meanwhile concentrate on building a new life for yourself and the kids..XX

Thanks, Tara, dear! Well this is just a glimpse of some of the craziness I have dealt with over the decade. Unfortunately, it is not so simple; I mean we even somehow managed to have a nice conversation at lunch and that transferred into some nice time after work today..... marriage is so hard to predict that way! Thanks for your vote of confidence.... your love & light buddy.....

Ugh. Sounds like something that would happen at my house if I had made such an error. After all, I'm very smart, so how can I make a mistake. Ugh. I try to stay on my toes, so it doesn't happen too often.

Feelin' for you.

Thanks Pamela. Ugh is right....