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Dual Military Marriage.....

My husband and I have been together for two years and married for a year. We are both in the military and have been separated for the past year because we are stationed in different states. For the past 11 months he has been stationed in WA while Im in SC which meant we only saw each other once every 2-3 months. At the beginning of September he moved to VA and he is now a 6 hour car ride away so we can see each other every weekend if we wanted. Here is the problem. Over the past couple months things got really rough and we almost ended it. However we came to an agreement where we would wait until we lived together (which will happen in Jan 2011) to see if things will be better because we will be living together and the stress of a long distance marriage will be gone. Now we are in a situation where we can see each other every weekend but he doesnt want to see me that much; only every other weekend at the most. He says he needs time to ease back into being around me all the time. I dont understand that since we dont see each other all week long and so I dont consider seeing him every weekend as being too much time together. My feeling is that he just wants to spend time drinking with his friends rather hanging out with me Since we have been apart that is pretty much what he does every weekend and I think he is just not ready to give that up yet. I have told him time and time again that we can be together and see his friends. He says it has nothing to do with his friends and everything about hime needing time to get used to me again. I really dont know what to believe right now. I cant understand how not seeing each other can make the distance between us less. I want to b with him as much as I can being that we are in a long distance marriage. Maybe you all can shed some light on my situation. Thanks!
schm2055 schm2055 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 6, 2010

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Sounds like he wants to live the single life. I know all about easing back into the relationship because I have been in one for 7 years. Military life is very stressful and maybe he does need time alone every other weekend. Who knows...only you and him. It will be up to you to decipher how he feels. If you feel like you are not getting what you need and he does not want to figure out what you need to be happy, it may show where his priorities lie. Don't waste too much time on someone that is not committed to you. Life is too short. Enjoy it.

if a man seems to be no longer interested in you, it seems more practical to just let him go because u will just continue hurting yourself... you deserve better than staying in an unhappy relationship... love yourself, girl.