Long Distance Is Killing Me

I have been with my partner for over a year now, and 8 months of that have been long distance. When we first started dating and going out it was so easy. but then i had to move 7 hours away to study, and the first month or two it was good we talked every night or second night. But the last few month things have been falling apart, the communication is fall down and i feel neglected.

All i want him to do is send me a letter, but lately it has been hard to even get a phone call. I often send a letter or small cheap parcel just to let him know i love him, and i thought i might get a leter back but never did. Then someone told me you have to spell things out to boys, so i asked (even though it spoilt the whole idea of the spontinuity of getting a letter). and guess what even though i told him how much i would appreciate getting a short letter in the post he hasn't sent one. I accident left my bank card at his when i went down two weeks ago and and he had to post them down, he put them in an envelope with nothing else, not even a note saying hi. It broke my heart considering he knew how much i wanted a letter.

Last week he didnt call once or answer my calls, becuase he went tot he pub after work. And this plus a lot more was it for me. and i ended it, even though i still loved him. But he apologiesed said soory he loved me and he promised me he would try. I was trying so hard not to give in but i love him so much. so now we are back together and nothing has changed. He still can't manage to put sometiime away to talk to me or write me a letter.

He always tells me he love me, but he never shows me. And it really hurts me. to think i am putting so much in to this relationship and trying so hard and getting nothing in return.

I am to scared to leave him. He is the only one i have ever loved or been able to open up to. And i when we are together it is perfect. the connection is there and everything else is forgotten. however even lately when i visit he is too busy and we hang out with his friends and not just the two of us. I think i am starting to see a side of him i dont like. I want to ignore it but it destroying me. and i cant leave him, becuase last time i did he cried and i cant hurt him like that.

Shaz71 Shaz71
18-21, F
5 Responses Aug 29, 2010

Let him go! I do long distance and my bf and I text and talk every day even talk twice or as much as we can! If he is still interested he would be communicating with you. You can't expect toms of letters from men because they aren't into it--usually women are the ones to write letters. But if you don't talk everyday that is a red flag!!!!!! GET OUT NOW!! He is probably cheating too :/

Oh but I know it's hard letting go of your first love. However, if things don't feel right in your heart, then it's not meant to be. There will be someone out there, that it will just work with. <br />
You have to take everything you've learned from this relationship, and allow it to help you grow as a person. That way, the next time a great guy comes along, you will be able to open up again, and you will have this guy (but more importantly yourself) to thank.<br />
<br />
I'd say ask yourself how being in this relationship makes you feel the majority of the time. Yes, relationships take work to maintain. But they should not BE work. If you feel down more than happy then this relationship just isn't working for you. And that doesn't necessarily say anything about him as a person.

Girl, I've been down this road. I know all of the emotions of long distance relationships and everything that you're going through, but you have to let go and if he loves you, he'll come back. Long distance relationships are too heart breaking)':

Girl I feel you, I'm having the same problem right now

tell him u miss his sweet vioce and you love him to death and he will hopefully reply i know what buys like bc im a boy