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Being Ignored

My boyfriend and I met over Facebook. Now, I know what you're probably thinking, "What if he's a forty year old pervert? He could be lying to you! You never know what goes on when you're not there!" etc, etc. We have some mutual friends that we both know in person, so I knew he was a good guy from the start.

We've been going out for a little over three months, not to mention the solid friendship we made before confessing to each other. Now, the first two months were absolutely amazing, I could tell him anything, he was never judgmental, kept secrets well, and was always there for me. That is, up until these past couple weeks.

He got a job this summer to start saving up for a plane ticket as well as a camera for his laptop so we could video chat, meaning he's gonna be busy. At first, yeah, we wouldn't talk as much, and I understood that. Although, if we couldn't talk anytime during the day, he'd either send me a message saying goodnight, or one the next morning to greet me, let me know he was thinking about me. Lately though, it started turning into five days at a time when he wouldn't send me one message. At first, I thought, "Ah, he must be really busy, I shouldn't bother him." Soon, I started noticing how he'd have conversations with his friends over Facebook though. Knowing he wasn't busy at that moment, I messaged him saying I hope he's doing okay and other things. Guess what? I was ignored. The first time, it kind of hurt, wondering why I was being ignored while he talked to his other friends and not me, but I shrugged it off. The third time this happened though, my heart started to really ache. Why are you ignoring me? Are you getting bored of me? Were you lying when you said you loved me?

Now, I'm scared. I don't wanna tell him all this 'cause I don't wanna seem clingy, seem like I don't want him talking to anyone else but me. I feel like we're growing apart though! I feel like I'm slowly slipping away from something that's really important to me! I know I may sound dramatic and I'm blowing things out of proportions, but the thought of us breaking up keeps eating away at me. I don't know what to do about it, I just don't want to lose him before we even meet in person. If any of you guys who understand my situation have any advice for me, I'll gladly take it. I now know one of the worst feelings in the world is to be ignored by someone you love.
PinkButterfly841 PinkButterfly841 18-21, F 6 Responses Jul 30, 2012

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Maybe im to late to give advice, but if i can give out advice, dont worry too much, youll be fine, realize that you 18-21. thats a busy time in life. Hes probably working hard im sure. ^^

Thanks for the advice! I really appreciate it! Things have gotten a lot better lately. :) Oh, and I'm not actually 18, I did tat because of the adult filtering content on some stuff that's not necessary to be there and everything. I'm 15, my boyfriend just turned 18, big difference, I know. ._.

lol Nah , ive dated a 30 year old mother before so as long as its not pedo its cool by me ^^. And yeah no problem, If you want any more advice , please message me! =) Id love to help anytime ^-^ btw I love your profile ic! Im a huuuuuge pokemon nerd =B

Really? Yeah, I'm not a huge fan of pedos either..Thanks! :D Really? Haha! Me too!

I can tell this is going to be a very good friendship! x3

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your not over reacting message him and tell him that if he doesn't start paying attention to you then your gonna dump him cause he's being a jack ***

No worries. Since I have written this things between us have gotten better, it was a misunderstanding on my part. Thanks so much anyway. :)

im very glad for you

Thanks!

cool

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we went 2 montsh awithout talking was my fault. he wrote me paragraphs.i was going through depression and didnt share alot with him,and he was upset,but i dont wanna be debbie downer whe we chat,but he made me promise even to share my bad days as well as good. weve only seen each other in the flesh once in 2003 then just this yr from may to july...i am hopelessly in love with him.i wont dare brag but ldr's do work well sometimes just have to remember nothing is perfect.

I'm happy for you both. Seems your love for each other is very strong, I hope things go well. :)

gawd i hate waiting for my cell to DING that "special facebook ding"..i have to go about my day and function,as does he and we cant talk all the time.i wish we could talk 3-4 hrs a day every other day something..hes a busy person he likes to go and do,this is one of the millions of thing i love about him.

Ah, yeah, I'm the same. Always waiting for some sort of notice from him. What I'd really love is for him to just be here, but that's not possible right now, sadly.

As Teardrinker mentioned in her reply, ( if they are in love with you they will make time for you) is pretty much the way I look at it. I am not a fan of being ignored when it comes to chatting. The thing that I have learned in the social networking world, is that it is universal when it comes to being ignored. Many reasons are used when one is confronted, but think about this.If one is confronted and they REPLY, then chances are they are telling you the truth as to what happend when they did not get back to you, but that is if they reply in the same day or at least the next day. But if you see them replying and chatting with others on another social network (facebook) and they do not get back to you, for a while or at all, then chances are they have been playing you from the start. Maybe reply to something that he writes to another person on facebook. See if he replies to you then, but if he does, don't reply back right away and see if he continues to try to contact you, then you will see if he really is who is says he is. Hope that helps.

Thanks for your help. Right now I feel like I just need to settle down before I do anything though.

i have had a steady love/freindship relationship with a man in the uk. we met randomly in a chat room. weve longed for one another ever since talked years 10 years he just went home a week ago,now i learned in those 10 years( hes younger than me btw) is that as long as we speak daily every other day unless we cant and we kinda tell each other "hey im going to be so and so,might not chat to you tomorrow"etc.<br />
if they are in love with you they will make time for you. and vise versa but we have to realize as bad as it hurts,we lead seprate lives.but we are bonded by love and trust.

Thank you for your help. I'm just gonna think about the situation a little more.