Forever..not

I've been with this man for a year and 7-8 months now. I adored him, we had our ups and down. Fights then cuddles but now I'm just so lonely.
At first all I wanted was to move with him, be with him, everything with him now all I want to do is have space and actually be with someone close to me. Who can hold me, kiss me, and we can actually go on dates.
When Him & I first started it was amazing I was completely happy now I just feel sick and unhappy seeing his messages and my heart hurts. I cried on the phone and he had a hurt voice telling me "We can work, I promise, work out buddies remember?" He started saying all our plans and I just cried wishing he would leave my life I told him I hate him for making me feel so alone and he said "okay, sorry.."
He was controlling, never liked short hair, or piercings and here I am. Short hair, Stubborn and with piercings.
We use to be so close and now I feel so distant. He always said he was going to visit, never happened.
One time in our relationship he liked another girl and wanted a break, I thought nothing at first till I realized it was to get lucky with her, months later I asked him what happened to her? All he replied was she was a *****, slept around and yet he took her and her twin sister to a convention. They even took pictures together and It made me quite miserable but I didn't say anything because he would bring my ex and how I talk to him. (Another long distant relationship)
Now I'm at the point where I feel like I want to break up with him, I fear it though he always says the right words to make me stay and hes so much more better everytime I try to leave..I'd hate to leave him but I hate being alone.
He promised Forever..But Forever couldn't last because I feel alone.
LovelyScars LovelyScars
13-15, F
Dec 6, 2012