My girlfriend is telling me she isn't sure if she wants to stay with me but she says she still loves me and doesn't want to leave. She is very confused because of her own personal issues. I try so hard to help her but I have the habit of getting jealous easily and there's this guy she recently met and she isn't sure of she likes him or not but he is gonna goto her house some time and I'm nervous. My mind doesn't know which issue to solve first. Or if I should solve them at all. She said I'd remain her friend and we'd date again after she experienced some more stuff which made me very depressed as well. I don't know how to feel about any of it and I really need a little encouragement or helpful advice or something...
AntiGameBoy AntiGameBoy
18-21, M
4 Responses Aug 19, 2014

Guys, guys.
This is a very delicate situation.
We have to diffuse it properly or it could ruin him.

Hey :), I couldn't leave without posting a little message to chear you on. First, let me tell you that I know from where you're coming, long distant relationship are a double edged sword, they can strengthen a relationship to the point that they lead to a happy settled marriage or they can destroy what you thought to be the greatest love on Earth. As a girl, I do understand why your girlfriend is so confused,some people might bash me for what I am gonna say but experience proved it to be true time and again: "Far from the eye, far from the heart". Imagine if you're a girl(or a guy), living far from you emotionnal support (lover) and then out of nowhere, there that guy(or girl) stepping in the play, being nice, sweet, being everything you wanted and most importantly the support you lake so much. So your heart starts to waver and the guilt gnaws what is left of an already beaten up heart. I cannot blame her for trying to seek confort from wherever she can but I DO blame her for treating you like a back-up plan. You're not the puppy waiting for his owner to come back from home, you're a guy with a heart that loves and you deserve respect for that. I went through the same thing and it took me only 1 month and a half to shake my current relationship. My boyfriend is really jealous and it doesn't help that I'm Men's little girl. Lonely I went to a chatroulette just to talk to people and I met a guy from US, he was sweet and SO considerate. His first and only relationship left beaten up black and blue and I felt the urge to console him, he liked my smile and I liked the manliness in him. With the problems escalating with my boyfriend who really sees me as the one, I wanted to end things with him(boyfriend) and throw myseld in this new adventure. But I stopped and tried to think as the rational person that I am, that guy is there no matter how funny,quirky,sexy, sweet he can be. If he is the one, no matter how far I drift away from him, I will end coming back to him and then destiny will unfold. So darling, you're not a tissue to be used then tossed until a better time, it's not your fault that you're jealous. Actually, I have a weak spot for jealous guys ( not stalker, wife-beater mode). So just take some time with her (on the phone or skype is better so you can see each other). Talk the things through and end it with: Do you want to be with me now, not later, not until you feel you had your fill of living crazy things but do you want to be with me now because I need you now? Don't accept excuses, just a clear, sincere and upfront answer. It's gonna hurt for her because it did for me, I'm still scared that I let the one who is meant for me get away BUT I know that I couldn't live up with myself if I deceived either one of them. So my best advice is stop hiding behind pety arguments, face the chimera head on and kick her butt! ;) I hoped that it helped and as always, don't forget to smile!

Don't date long distance relationships until you are older they suck and ATM your too young and it's very unhealthy

Don't wait for her if she dumps you. Don't let her keep you the back burner while she "experiences stuff". You should dump her. You deserve better.