I Felt Unwanted

I'm in a relationship this time but i am being ignored, and feeling unwanted..
My boyfriend lived thousand miles away from me.. He kept on telling me that he is busy with his schedule, and had many conflicts to deal with. We were now one year but if i would look back from the first 6 months of our relationship, i could remember how good he was, and how much he cares about me.I could really feel his true affection of love. I know that his life wasn't great because he has many things to deal with and it been so hard for him. I understand that.. In fact, i just keep on waiting on him. I think, my patience is just so wide. I had to wait for him 'cause if i won't, then our relationship would end up to nothing. There were times when he'd never talked to me for 1 month but im still holding and still waiting when he would go online.. I think, i am just the only one holding our relationship and keep trying to stay calm and patient.. The next past 6 months wasn't good.. I had to understand him and i had to be more patient. Till now, im still waiting and keep emailing him and reminded him that i am still here waiting. I sent him almost 7 emails for about 3 weeks but he had never corresponded.. The first 6 months that we had, was the most perfect communications that we had, but the last 6 months was the most disappointing communications. If i'd never sent him a card, he would never remember our 1st anniversary and how long he had never talk to me. Am i really in a relationship? or in an empty relationship? I do really love him but it seems like he doesn't care about me anymore..what am i gonna do? i keep thinking what he really wants but i don't get an answer..I felt so sad about our relationship.. hope anybody here could give me an advice..
ImawomanwholoveGod ImawomanwholoveGod
22-25, F
7 Responses Oct 20, 2012

Let him go, move on. I did what you are doing for 4 years then ended marrying the man of my dreams who I waited for so long....10 years have passed and he's not into me. I lied to myself, he doesn't want to be with me. We have 3 girls and I know he regrets marrying me. I'm not happy and neither is him. I guess he married me just out of kindness that I begged and waited for him for so long, he felt sorry for me. Move on and find someone who will appreciate you. He probably has someone...mine cheated on me during the long distance on the 4 years and confessed it years later.r

Just new in the community but would have loved to know if you got the perfect advise from some one as a good friend.If not so,you said you love him right,just follow your heart & lovely emotions as a true lover & pray harder.Destiny will take its courses in due time.Don't be discouraged because it happens to all men.Thanks

thank you for that.. but sad to say, we just broke up one month ago and i think we will never be again.. i loved him, yes but i think my love for him wasn't enough to make him stay with me.. hoping and praying that one day, i could find someone better more than what i expect..hoping we could be friends here.. happy new year and May the Lord bless you with so much joy, love and happiness in life.. you take care..

Even sex is just an event unless there is love.

I am so so sorry for you.
Emptyness is just so horrible.
Look for love and give yourself to someone who will love you.
It sounds like he is weak. Too week to tell you that he does not love you or too lazy to come and get you.
I think you need your close friends to support you and help you find someone who will love you.

One thing I saw a response where you were worried about 'looking pathetic' if you take away one thing and that is do not feel that way. Do not make decision based on that type of feeling.

i am confusing right now.. i do not know what to decide base in my relationship.. i am getting tired but i don't want to give up.. i want to hold on but it seems like i am the only one doing it for this long distance relationship.. i hope picking up someone to love me is easy but it is not the way we expect.anyway, thanks for your wonderful advise..

sometimes that happen and online relationship is really hard,why not spent time with your friends so you wont feel lonely.

i would be looked pathetic if i would spend my time with them.. i have them, but still my mind thinking somewhere.

in that case try to talk to your bf what really the score so you wont think and you know where your place in his heart ....

i have tried to asked him many times and he would always say he loves me.. i don't know what to believe.. but all i know this time is just, i am in a relationship but i feel single still.. i have tried to send him two emails for the past two weeks but i don't get any response from him.. in the month of october, i got only 1 response from him. i do not know what to do now and how to start my life..

well im sure something going on where are you from and your bf?the best thing is not to expect much because you will be hurt if in the end you have nothing to look for in the relationship and i guess make some acquaintance so it would be better for you too...

i don't think if making some acquaintance would be a good idea just to forget my feelings towards him but i know time will come and i will remember no more his name.. i am from the Philippines and my boyfriend is came from Michigan, USA..

2 More Responses

Stop contacting him and you will see soon enough if there is a relationship at all. You need to know now! That is not asking too much. If 90 days rolls by and you hear nothing.... you are in fact finished because he was not that into you.

thanks for that.. i just felt empty this time.. i am being ignored.. i sent him an email again yesterday but he never responded me.. i think i really need to stop for a while and wait for days till he would talk to me, if not, then I'm finished..

Wise choice!

I get the impression your boyfriend has been pulling away for some time even though it's only the last 3 weeks you haven't heard from him at all. The unfortunate thing about a distance relationship is that there has to be so much trust because it's so easy to behave badly, undetected. Can you really trust him? Also, I think, by waiting around for him you are giving him too much power so he can treat you how he likes and he knows you'll always be there. I suggest you try to move on. You may find that if you stop chasing him he wonders why and starts chasing you, but even if that happens I suggest you think carefully. A relationship shouldn't be one sided and if he isn't willing to give, in the same way you are to him then it isn't likely to work and you should seek a more compatible partner. I wish you the best of luck with finding your way forward.

Thanks for that comments and advises.. I hope that would be so easy to do. I guess, it would be better if would think first about my decision.. I love him so much and i don't want to let him go.. So I'll better think first if letting him go would be a good decision. I don't want to make a decision that will hunt me back..