Am I Wrong For Going Against My Familes Wishes???

Ok so my soldier is almost home. He has a little over a month left. We have discussed us getting married and decided we will. We are not having a big wedding or anything like that. Just going to the court house. We will be married exactly one month after he returns. The only thing is he is stationed at ft bliss in El Paso. This means i will have to move a thousand miles away from home. Home is New Orleans. My family is very unhappy with my choice. They don't want me and my daughter to move. My daughter is two and my soldier has raised her as his own since she was about 5 months. He loves her. He wants nothing more than for us to be a family. I love my family very much and we are very close. They told me I'm crazy for marrying him. That i don't know him anymore because he has been in Iraq. They really don't want us to get married. not because they don't like him but because hes been gone so long. i tried to explain to them that we have become so much strong through is deployment. They just don't understand. i don't expect them to i just want them to support me. I marrying my soldier despite what they say. they are calling me selfish saying i should think about how this affects them as well, but i say its my life. I know if i don't marry him  i will regret this forever. Does this really make me selfish and a bad daughter/sister?

luvsmysoldier luvsmysoldier
22-25, F
4 Responses Mar 15, 2010

I am so sorry to hear this. I can relate but not in the same ways. I do not have any kids and my soldier is just getting back from Basic but we are planning on getting married right after he gets back. I am having the same problems with my family not wanting me to do it... Let me know how things go.

Thanks for the help. I know no one ever understands military relationships. Its hard to explain to someone that you havent seen your soldier in a year but in that year your love has grown so deep. I guess the saying my soldier always tells me is true "distance is to love as wind is to fire, It extinguishes the weak and fuels the strong"

no u r not wrong. This is your life the man you love. And believe me i understand. When my soldier returns home we might be as well and that would mean moving onto base and we arent even sure where that will be. My dad and mom arent happy about it but i love him and im not going to loose him. Explain that you'll come visit. And it doesnt make you selfish at all.

I don't think this makes you sound like a bad daughter or sister. You're following your heart and they should be happy for that. You and your soldier love each other and always act like a family and you're going to sacrifice some important things in your life but I'm sure you can do it!! I'm so happy that you guys are getting married. Congrats on that!! ( :