Troubled Marriage

It's been a couple of weeks that I found out that my husband has been having all of these sexual and I love you chats online. The latest is that he has been trying to make a move on our nephews new wife. We have been married for 15 years. I have stuck with him through everything and supported him emotionaly with every decision and hobby he has. I have been there through sickness and have been a very good wife to him. This is the second time he has done this with the online chatting. He did this years ago and we worked through it. This time he has gone to far. The nephews new wife told my nephew everything and she saved every chat. My husband is 63 I am 48. He is chasing after these 20 year olds making them believe that he is all that. 90% of me wants out of the marriage. I love my husband and loved him unconditionally. I just don't know if I can get pass this. This has caused a huge family scandal. I am so embarrased and hurt. I just don't know how this can be fixed.
mizzrose mizzrose
46-50, F
6 Responses Nov 11, 2010

SOMETIMES , there's just some boundaries that you can't cross....give him an ultimatum OR LEAVE !

My husband is doing similar things. He is using aps like skout texting local 20 year old virgins. He has even called some. I am devastated. I am a good wife of 18 years but I can't be 20 again and I can't be a virgin. He is living in a fantasy world! I understand how hard it is for you.

Well Mhcalum I'm sure this must make you feel very sad. Your husband is living in some delusion that having extramarital affairs with young women is somehow going to make him feel like a virile man. He is mistaken of course. All he is doing is showing himself to be untrustworthy and unfaithful. And he is also having some unresolved issues with his libido, but instead of addressing it with you, his wife, he's choosing to behave in very damaging and hurtful ways. It may be very difficult after all of these years, but you need to put a stop to all of this.

Of course everyone has their own feelings and opinions, but if this were me the answer would be very cut and dry - leave him. He is being self-centered beyond belief. Your nephews wife? That shows a complete lack of respect for you, your nephew, his wife, and the rest of your family. What is he thinking??!

To me it is not that he is flirting with just any women it is his nephew’s wife that is very close and personal to you. The next family get together is probably going to go bad for him because I am sure by now the whole family knows.

What does he say in response? <br />
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If he doesn't seem to think he has done anything wrong, then you can expect more of this in the future. If you are not okay with that, then you need to leave him.

may be you need to very clear in asking him what he want. ask him if it is physical relation he wants or its just a female friend