I'm Really Lost And Confused.

Girl! Let me tell you, being in a wheelchair in no way should hinder you from doing great things! A great close close friend of mine was in a wheelchair all her life. I'm telling you she was the happiest girl you'd ever meet. Was her life great, to the world no, but to her it was. She volunteered working with special needs kids, went to college, she became something great bc she didn't let her disability define her. She overcame the odds! A few years back she passed away bc of her disease, she was one of the only people to live with the disease as long a she did. I was devastated when I heard the need, we had moved and her mother couldn't find a way to get ahold of us. I was getting married ad sent an invitation to her and her family, her mom found a way to get ahold of us to tell us about christy before my wedding day, I found out while on vacation with my future husband and our son. I'm telling you all this bc Christy made a huge impact in my life. She loved Jesus and it beamed all over her! You can't let being in a wheelchair define you! Ask God to show you a sign of what todo! I don't know you, but I know you aren't destined to live a life as you are talking! Rise above your circumstances and don't let people define you bc of your wheelchair, let them define you from who you truly are. Get out of your room and go talk to people!

Being 23 is crazy in general...and having a health issue that affects your life so dramatically ...well that makes 23 even worse lol



but you seem to know what your problem is and be able to intellectualize it...so you are no dummy!



Listen, fear makes us lazy...it's EASY to not do anything and then complain about the crappy results, it makes it like "your life is just happening to you" you are victimizing yourself. If you were someone else what would you tell YOU?... It might be time to get a little bit of power back..little by little you will see your happiness meter grow~~ You are going to have to learn to ask for it, and it's nothing to be embarrassed about, it's your life, nobody else can live it for you, Nobody said it would be easy right? Come on you can do it!!

I'm not sure where you live, but I'm wondering if you've ever visited a spinal hospital before? Ever hung out in their gyms? There are some REMARKABLE people hanging out, working out there. People whose lives went from perfectly functional to completely or at least partially paralized. It's about a three year plan for most spinal cord injury survivors: they have to go through all the emotions of grieving the loss of their independence. But man, when they find themselves and discover their true purposes in life? They're explosive with positive energy. You might try joining a fully accessible gym somewhere and give it a try. You'd meet people with similar disabilities, for one thing; and can learn a lot from them. And it could ultimately work its way into a job for you. Once you're making a little money of your own, it's very liberating. You'd have more life options. But also interacting with people who've overcome where you're at right now mentally? Is very empowering.



I'm going to recommend my usual read for people who just can't quite put their finger on the source of the problem: Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude", by Napolean Hill. Seems you've got plenty of free time, and I really think it could help you get motivated, and past this current emotional void and struggle that's holding you back.