21 Years

It's beautiful that you have found someone you are so connected with. Be prepared for the fact that there will be starers and haters. But let the starers be starers and the haters be haters. If they say unkind comments, my guess is, they are not happy with some part of their own life. Perhaps show them some kindness? Give them a smile, pull yourself closer to your man to show you are content, and the 'haters' can say nothing more, as they know that you are happy and nothing they say will break your spirit.

I a girlfriend that's much younger. The description of you and yours is very similar to ours. She's worried about what others think. Silly I know, not one of them is a part of us. However, many of us put great (misplaced) stock in the opinions of others.

I think your story is gorgeous and to be honest, I don't think 21 years is 'bad' at all.

I'm just about 18...very mature for my age, though. Yes, I know everyone says that, but in my case, I'm emotionally mature. In fact, I find it easier to get along with adults.

People can judge or not, but I'm absolutely head-over-heels in love with a man who's 58(so, that's a 40 year gap) and no matter what anyone says, if he wants me too(not able to find out yet) I won't hesitate for a moment to be with him.

See the thing is, it's not physical age that's an 'issue'. That's just society's point of view. It's more to do with if you share the same or a similar level of emotional maturity(similar interests help, too) that things work, as it were. You'll be able to understand each other and the younger person in the relationship won't be faced with that typical problem where they're still a 'kid' in many ways and end up driving the older one insane or something. Anyway, I'm very pleased to hear that you are both happy. This is probably said a lot, but pay no attention to what people say about you. The only thing that matters is that you're in love and life is great together. I hope you spend many more wonderful years together!

I would find it hard to obedient to a man who was my age let alone accept punishment from him.

My wife Iris is 21 years and some months my senior. I am 63. She is 85. Five December shall be our 20th anniversary. The marriage was more fun in the past because she was a live wire and would go places and do things and take me places too. I think that the biggest turning point for the worse was when she needed to discontinue hormone replacement therapy.



Now she has a very low energy level and is suffering from Alzheimers or some other condition like unto it. She depends more and more on me and on others.



Still I have no regrets. If she passes before I do, I shall then need to find another purpose in life.

Hi Robbo21,

I have always believed that life is there to live only once. If you are happy with your hubby and vice versa then there's nothing wrong in it. Everyone has their own likes and dislikes. What people look at when judging age gap relationships is what the general norm is, where you dont find huge age gaps. These norms are there for a reason and quite a few of them as well.



However what is over-riding to all these is unconditional love for each other. If that love is there between 2 people then there is nothing wrong in getting togather.



However when you start a family (assuming you will), your children will have a father who is a lot older than the parents of peers. You and your hubby will need to put in a lot of time with the kids. When your child is say 16yrs the father will be about 65+, both of you need to be concious about this sort of things and have a plan to handle them.



Best wishes for the future.

Hi everyone



I'm a British journalist looking for an age-gap couple for a Valentine's Day relationship feature for a quality Sunday supplement. I'd really love to hear from you if you're in a couple where the woman is at least 20 years older than her partner. It's a positive piece on loved-up couples!



If that's you or or you'd like more details, please email me direct at helen.gent@tiscali.co.uk



Thanks all. :)

Hi Rachel. Thanks for your interest but we are no longer experiencing any opposition from friends or family and although you still get the occasional double take from members of the public, it doesn't effect us at all.

Hi Robbo21 and ZekeB,



My name is Rachel and I work in development at a top LA production company. We are currently looking for people in age gap relationships who, like yourselves, are meeting opposition from the public, friends and family. We would love to hear your stories in further depth if you are interested or anyone else in this group. I can be reached at unconventionalcasting@gmail.com. Thank you for your time!



Best,

Rachel

Hi robbo21. I wonder if you could follow up on how your relationship has developed. I'm nearly two years into a relationship with a woman who is almost 21 years younger than I am, and now she wants to marry. I can't seem to quiet my doubts that (a) our age difference will be a heavy burden for years to come, limiting our social circle severely and (b) that at age 23 she's not realistic about what it will mean for her and for us. I'm particularly troubled by how our age difference limits us socially. There are few friends of ours who seem capable of accepting us both for who we are, and relating to us. My friends treat her like a kid, and hers treat me like an uncle. Have you had that experience? What challenges have you two faced, and how have you got past them?

Personally, I believe that if it is meant to be, it will happen so no sense trying to force an issue is it is not right. Are you really sure she is physically attracted to you too? She may not be interested "in that way" and only want friendship but not want to hurt your feelings by being blunt. Just a thought but just cause you have lots in common doesn't mean you will be compatible on every level. Good luck x

Hi every one I have met a woman whom i have fallen in love with and she knows it but will not let a relationship happen. I am 62 and I look about 48 she is 42 and looks maybe late 20's early 30's. She already has her own group of friends but when we talk we have so much in common

it is really scary. Is she wright in not wanting to let it happen?



I am very glad that you are happy together. LOVE Samantha

Age is not important, what is is that you gel together and live to love and support each other.

I never been with an olderrrrrr person, i mean only 10 years difference one time and I think is kind of sexy to be with a older man, to seduce him and to make him moan while do in it, and he has greys even sexier, i think an older man appreciates more when it comes to you know what.

So why not? live your life don't pay attention to what people think as longest you are happy that is what matters.

I feel very blessed and thank God for letting me find him.

nice story. glad you are happy!