Can Love Really Be Labled As Interracial??

I have been in an interracial marriage for 10yrs and in the beginning it was hard for us. The stares, the snickers and comments but it didnt matter because our relationship was about the two of us. I really have never had a preference. I was raised in a predominantly white community but i have dated all races. Whether it be black, white, blue, green, yellow or red people are people. When you love and I mean truly love you dont see color you see a PERSON that makes you happy, a PERSON you see yourself giving your heart to which i believe is the biggest acheivement in life.......trusting someone with YOUR heart. My soulmate just happens to be white and I happen to be black. We fell in love with each other for who we are not what color we are. Those who make dating a certain race a priority i dont believe are looking for true love. I believe they are stereotyping as others do. "I will only date this race becuase they do or dont do this." If you ask me they dont want love they want the idea that only one race can supply what they are looking for. But then again this is my own opinion.

alwayslovingfromafar alwayslovingfromafar
31-35, F
22 Responses Mar 20, 2009

Beautiful life story. Your children are beautiful and look like a very happy family. Keep your head up :D

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hey that is cool , God looks at the heart & not the outward apperance, but we live in a fallen world, it could be tougher on the kids as they grow up because thy will not be of one group or the other and concidered an outsider, personaly it doesn't matter to me, But sometimes kids can be rude . It sounds like you two have together and are in Love and the kids are happy, So keep up the Good Work :)

Hey drumsticks thanks for the comment, but I've got to disagree with u on one of your points. Being biracial is not tougher on my kids. Yes kids today are cruel, yes kids are also brutally honest. But the one thing that those two types of kids are not, is educated. My children are now 13,11 and 4. From the time they could distinguish color they knew there was a difference. I remember asking my two oldest at the ages of 5 and 4 what color they thought they were and both of them looked at me like I had two heads and said " mommy, I'm Teyana and I'm Austin". So basically all they see themselves as is an individual person. In all it boils down to how you raise your children, what morals and values we enstil in them. If it's tough for anyone its me and my husband who have to battle the ignorances our children will come in contact every day but I'm not worried, they are doing very well and have the best of both worlds with an influx of information for them. They know it's not always necessary to be a part of a group , especially one that won't allow them to be themselves. And I know every parent says this but I'm lucky, I have great children who are very smart and teach ME something new every day. So I thank God daily for my husband and the three children he has blessed me with. :) thank you for your kind words

When my daughters first asked why they looked different than the predominantly white kids in their school, I explained that they were like chocolate milk.. They absolutely love that analogy even today (8 and 7) and had no problems explaining that to the very seldom kid that may say something inappropriate. We are blessed to be in a time when the old way of thinking is drying out

Im Asian...and my boyfriend is European...its an exotic mix and for one thing I take him for how he is, and I quite like the difference, if anything. I have never looked at a persons colour, just their heart. But its so degrading when people say things and it really brings you down, so thank you :) for posting, its given me just that little but more strength I needed...! :)

I cant wait to start a family...cant wait to get married.. just am in the process of finishing my degree. Oh i added you as a friend if thats okay? maybe we can chat sometime. im all about making new friends and especially ones that know where im coming from and ones that can help me. =)

thank you! beautiful babies is always the bonus to interracial marriages ;) lol

Thank you! you didnt come off rude or too harsh. Im def not letting it over take my relationship. We are pretty strong and mainly that cuz we both dont let things bother us to the core and we talk about things and we try to be very open. thank you for the advice.<br />
<br />
by the way you have really beautiful children =)

Honestly JR you cannot focus your energy trying to make others understand. For one its not your responsibility and two it could put a strain on your relationship with your bf. We always want the ones we love to accept the person we declare to be the love of our life but that is not always the case. Especially parents, they swear they always know what is in your best interest but IN the NEWS today MOM and DAD that's not the case! But in the same aspect if you are constantly worrying about the fact that your colors do not match or about what other people are thinking, more than likely you aren't ready for that journey. You need to be prepared for scrutinizaton and judgment on a daily basis because trust me it is still out there. If you let this affect you it will affect your relationship. so you need to be sure that you are ready. Is it normal not to think about the fact that you are different races? YES! Its normal if you constantly think about being different. NO! if it is a constant nag then you should not be together.<br />
i hope that helps a little. i have no intention of coming off harsh or rude I just tell it like it is and I feel if people were to do that more often life would be a lot easier.

Im getting married in a lil over 2 years to my fiance who is white and i am black. I feel like color doesnt matter to me and i dont even notice it at times. Is that pretty normal. Jay is my first serious bf and i dont think my parents truly understand where we are coming from and how deep our love is. His parents love me and cant wait to have me in the family. how can you move past that resistance in a sense?

Im getting married in a lil over 2 years to my fiance who is white and i am black. I feel like color doesnt matter to me and i dont even notice it at times. Is that pretty normal. Jay is my first serious bf and i dont think my parents truly understand where we are coming from and how deep our love is. His parents love me and cant wait to have me in the family. how can you move past that resistance in a sense?

wow this is offically my fav<3 I am 21 and my story is very similar to your but im still in the getting stared at stage.I still am having a hard time getting use to it.

Yall are lovely

lol I like that-I will have to remember that one! I agree no matter what the circumstance people are going to talk-if it wasn't race it would be class, disparity bw looks or something so its best to just ignore it all

I totally agree with you firefly, i get the same questions and I laugh and say I like men and obviously since race is an issue for you, you don't fall under that category. Guaranteed drop of jaw to the ground. no matter how far we come there will always be one person out there who opposes and all you can do is live your life.

I love your story. I don't really like when people say "so you date black guys' or anything along those lines because to me it seems like they are insinuating that I am with him BECAUSE he's black-like they are trying to devalue what we have by turning it into something shallow. I love him and his skin color doesn't matter. So when someone says something like that I say "I like men, the man who has my heart happens to be black."

Lady42 beware, dont force the attraction. It will happen if its supposed to. And when you do meet that person color wont even be a part of the equation. Good luck to you

Moving, i can honestly say that I dont think about it. It sounds crazy especially when people are always looking and snickering but when i look at my husband i dont see his color just the man I fell in love with. I have dated all races and skin color is only a characteristic we are born with it doesnt make the person. Yes the "norm" is black men and white women. But who the hell made the rule??<br />
lol but realistically we dont get as much crap as you would normally get cuz its the "norm" being affiliated with the military. LOL

The picture of you and your husband is beautiful. I'm not in an interracial relationship but I am strongly desiring one only. Throughout the years I have noticed that I am attracting White men and for that reason I an interested in being in long-term serious relationship with one. Not just anyone. Of course one that is educated like myself, ambitious, handsome, tall, a gentleman from the heart and would be faithful to the relationship because that is the way I would be.

I agree. My husband is mixed with white and mexican, and im black and love him more than anything in this world!!!!! :D. **** what anyone else has to say...as long as you both are happy.

I really relate to your story. I am in an interracial <br />
<br />
relationship. But I never really think along those lines <br />
<br />
unless some *ss makes a comment or gives a look.<br />
<br />
People are people for cry out loud!

Your feelings are felt mutual!<br />
<br />
There a many that feel the way you do but can't "verballY' express our emotions.....THANK YOU.... :)<br />
<br />
S. Townsley<br />
HAAF/Savannah, GA