Is It Wrong..?

Hi, Just call me Nemue. I always loved Cartoons, I've admired them ever since, My dad introduced me to Animes, He was an Otaku.

I discovered Vocaloid when my friend showed me to it, What can i say really, They sounded good and I started to appreciate them. But then, What caught my eye was Nigaito, He was only a Fanmade character of Kaito, He wasn't popular unlike the other's but he felt special to me, His green Hair, Eyes, And clothes. The way he sings just makes me feel happy, As if my depression and hatred towards other's disappear when I see him..

Because of it I drew him as appreciation and love for him; I've been doing it for 4 years.

My sister, Who found out, Told my parents about it, They were staring of course but then started laughing, I felt so embarassed..

I- Is it really okay..? I feel ashamed of myself.. I don't know what to do anymore..
NeTane NeTane
13-15, F
3 Responses Nov 30, 2012

As long as you feel it doesn't become an obsession or something you feel you can't control I'm backin' you up buddy.
I've been in a similar position for 5-6 years now and let me tell you something, it's great to have that special someone that you can always trust with your secrets and deepest feelings and thoughts, don't let anybody tell you otherwise.
Stay strong Nemue :)

-ARK-

Woah woah, no. Don't question yourself on something like this. If you've loved him for this long, and are able to still function and continue with your life, then by all means stay the course. I know how it feels having people misjudge you on something like this, as I've had much ridicule for my love interest, but don't let it deter you. Your love is real, and the fact that he helps the depression you have makes it even more real.

I can relate though I've never had a lasting crush. Tbh this sort of thing usually feels nice because they are fictional. You build up all these great qualities in your head and they can't be proven wrong since the character isn't real. Idk, I just remind myself that it's not like I can have them so I should stop thinking about it if it's getting out of hand. Change your habits and step away from vocaloid for a while.