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In Love With My Own Character...

I am in love with my OWN story character, one that I just made up, around three years ago. Most people woulden't see him as perfect (His mother is either dead/left him, and his dad is a rich SOB to everyone but his own son, thankgoodness.)

I know he's not real. But I keep having dreams about him. I keep thinking about him, and our 'life' together (basically my life now but with him in it.)

I have never had a real boyfriend, or ever been on a date (I have been asked once or twice, but I always reply with a funny, yet subtle, 'no.')

Whenever I listen to a good song, if I'm in the mood I'll just create a music video in my head with him in it. I sound SO crazy, but when I really think about it, Edward Cullen has just as many girls who are head over heels for him, and he is just a fictional character, too.

We want what we can't have. And it hurts knowing that they're not real, and it hurts that I have a fake number on my phone with his name listed as a contact. It hurts that, even though you can't hug him or kiss him, he'll always be there in your mind, in your stories that you write, in your diary.

I don't know WHY I love him, I just do. And yes, it sucks.

I guess this is one of those things that you can't live with...but you can't live without...

ShinyStar ShinyStar 18-21 38 Responses Aug 24, 2009

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I'm so happy to know there are other people like me!! :'D It hurts so bad. :(

I love to make characters. I made a male protagonist and introduced him to my close friends by showing them a couple of drawings and a piece of paper with his personality description . Few of them fell in love with him, they said his imperfections made him perfect and he is the opposite of a guy. I love my main character for my own reason and not romantically. Then I wanted him to have someone, so hence I made another character; his love interest. It turned out she had a really important role in my fiction and I love her so much.

My best friend R ,also made two characters; male and female. So we decided to make a fiction using our characters. It was so much fun. We would sat down for almost an hour making the storyline and laughing. Then, my characters list began to increase as I made more and more characters. Also same goes to R. We had the older characters which consist of young adults and the teen characters( R calls them "the younger generation" ). We mainly focused on the older characters, because they're a lot more interesting to work with. My main character is in the older group.

Introducing my characters to my friends makes me elated. I always let myself to drift into my innerworld before going to bed every night. I told my best friend on how much my characters meant to me and she thought it was cute and sad for all writers. Sometimes I am anguish they're not "real" real. I want to see them so badly, walking and talking. Basically, watching them all interacting to one another , watching them LIVING and like you said they're real but merely unreachable :(

As a writer, as an artist, I have a theory for you too as an artist: a brain cell and the universe were photographed and put side by side, identical. so if our world is a person's dream, story, etc. then your character is technically real, not fake, but unreachable from where you are. Like other people say, the only way to reach him is through a story... Where you two can finally meet

Write a story where you two meet and fall in love. It'll help you cope, as you'll be able to live with him in one world.

I have the same problem, and practically do the same things. I draw him all the time... It just hurts so much...

You morph into a character which is not a bad thing at all; it's your creativity and imagination. Actually, when it is in your head like that you should really upload it. It'll make a great video.

..well not absurd sorry no offense I just couldn't think of the right word to use, and you're right about pple loving fictional characters. (: why else would there be series of books based on solely one character. sorry maybe it's just your ideal man, and your in love with your own idea- fictional charecter/fictional boyfriend. Sounds less absurd that way.

You created that character from yourself; the product of your imagination, experience, artistic nature, and creative will. It is, in part, a projection of yourself. If you find yourself in love with this character you are, indeed, experiencing a deep romance with yourself. Love can only begin in oneself and then flow out into the world in all directions like a radiant sun. Now, you may know what that feels like. Many cheers to you!


You know what's worse than thinking about a character that you're in love with? Well, my story is somewhat different. I'm in love with a real person, that will never know me. I can't reveal his name because he is famous. I'm married & have been for nearly 11 years, but we've been together longer than that. We have 2 girls together. But, every now & then for at least 2 or maybe 3 years I've been thinking about this other guy. Sometimes, I would try to go back in my mind & wished I've met him before & think I was with him more & had kids to him. Don't get me wrong, I do love my husband & my kids I have with him. But, also sometimes, I wish things were a little different.

Oh, me too! Who is it?

Message me.

I'm not married, but I can totally relate to what you're saying.

I am in love with a celebrity too!

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I would be too embarrassed to admit my fictional character crush, lol! But trust me, you're not that crazy - at least you're no weirder than I am, ha, ha!

You should be writing romance. Start with a blog or just save on word.

I have the same thing with my drawings :( One drawing to be specific. Well, it's many drawings of the same person. I drew him once about a year ago, and I was very satisfied with him from the beginning. Often when I'm drawing I create the character's personality and life around him while drawing and so it shapes the final result. It was the same this time as well. I feel like i know him, which is probably because i created him... but he is just perfect, you know? its hard not to get attached :) And don't worry it's not as mad as you think it is! x) I think it's ok, as it helps you develop what you look for in a guy as well as what it is you need to be happy :)

Just don't take it to some extreme level ;D

I will admit that I go through the same thing. But with multiple characters in my story. Most of them were based on people I really knew in real life, but some of them are completely fictional. Before I fall asleep each night, I lay in my bed and imagine i'm with this person, talking to her, being there for her, being sensitive to her thoughts and feelings. comforting her, being a loving partner and sharing our lives together, even if it is imaginary. There is nothing wrong with doing it. But I can tell you that if you depend on the fantasy too much, you will prevent yourself from having a real relationship.
Because I am disabled and on social security, and slightly overweight, I feel that no woman could be attracted to me or would want me, even though I have so much love to give, she would be worshiped as a goddess and praised for all of her personal qualities because I see that everything about her is good, even her flaws. Because i have this lack of self respect, and continue to dwell on the imaginary fantasies too much, I have not had a relationship in 13 years. I had a few relationships in high school, but they all ended because my abusive and anti-social parents kept getting involved and forcefully ending the relationships. They even lied to my fiancee that i didn't love her and joined the army to get away from her while i was away in basic training, and so she just disappeared.
After this, my entire young adult life, from 23 - 36 (my age now) was wasted on dreaming, and not acting. Despite the fact that I have a handicap and don't have much money, if I ever found a girl that would just come to me and say that she would love me regardless, and love me for my personal qualities that matter in life, instead of the negative things that are material, I would be her's instantly, and I wouldn't have to rely on a fantasy any longer.
You must search for your reality, but keep the qualities of the person of your fantasies as the qualities of what you search for and want in a real lover. Give people a chance. Don't wait until you are too old, like I did, or you will miss out on all that life and love can truly offer.

Without fantasizing about a imaginary person, I think it would be a good idea to make connections with real people. Just smile, say 'hi' and get started. You could meet the person of your dreams- but remember unlike in the fantasy world, they are real and have weaknesses and flaws; may not be agreeable all the time. But you would be able to get on with her because you are a good person.

Thank you so much for your kindness. I will seriously take your advice and be a little more proactive in my social activities, especially dating.

I have had a similar experience with a person who was in a dream I had one night. He was not anybody I have ever met or known, I don't even know anyone who looks like him, but in the dream he was so real it was scary. In the dream we were together and were intimate. It was some of the most beautiful lovemaking you could imagine. I don't know why this would have happened, but you can imagine that waking up that morning was a bummer!
I know this sounds crazy, but it really did happen. I think about that dream and him a lot. It was just so real it was freaky. I guess if I ever happened to meet someone who looked like him, I would probably be dumbstruck. At least now I don't feel quite so crazy....

I get this but the fake phone contact is crossing the line for me. Maybe some counseling is in order.

Really your in love with a blood sucker Jacob is much cuter plus he's Warm not cold like a ice cube I don't like vampires I like Werewolves better

Every girl or boy has a dream one, so it is natural. Dream is not bad but we should be realistic.

I didn't think there was so many people who also did this, I've grown up with my character, he's been with me for 8 years through everything ive been through, I've had real life boyfriends too but he's always there for me.

It is not so different, it strikes me, than holding on to the love of somebody we have lost, to remember details that over the years are memories or just dreams we attribute to memory. If we can love those from whom we are far away, sometimes for a long long time, who is to say what you feel is any less real?

I have the same thing! I turn down any and all possible partners because I see myself as being with my character. No-one can see him but me. He's mine. No-one can EVER take him away from me. We talk all the time, we watch movies together, go everywhere together... you just need to hone your imagination. I manage it and I'm happy. You're not alone in the slightest. Especially on the music video front! Ha ha. I do that.

OK, so it's a little annoying when someone takes his seat on the bus but, hey, he's just a little ... reality impaired :)

That is the cutest way I've ever heard it put. I have those same thoughts. :)

I too am an author, and personally, I am in love with several of my fictional characters!

One of my favorites is a scientist. I don't have a name for her yet, but she has bright red hair, which is always held back in a bun or ponytail. Let's just say, me and her have a "special" writer-character relationship!

You are SO *not* alone in this. A LOT of writers fall in love with their characters - and that's why they write them so well. What you're going through is very common for writers, although it's still painful. Just know that you have a lot of company.

When I found this group I wanted to add a story about falling in love with a character I created for a book I wrote. The character was based on someone I knew and I fell in live with him. But after the book was published, I got to spend time with the real man, and he is NOT the man I fell in love with. Thanks for sharing your story. I am amazed how many people share this experience.

I have the same problem. I'm also in love with a fake world I've written for a story; some of it exists in the "here-and-now", but not all in the same place. <br />
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You can't write a story without loving it; you can't make a character that's lovable without also loving that character. It's a sad reality to know they don't exist anywhere but in our minds.

I commented on another post about this same issue. Im a sc<x>ript writer and im in love with one of my characters she's far from perfect but I think making someone perfect ruins the spoils. Shes just perfect in my eyes though even with the flaws. Im glad im not the only one who feels this way.

I do the same way. Because I am so lonely. and I have fake name to . Hang in there . I feel it is ok.

hi there! so i very thankful that im not the only one experiencing such a heartbreaking, never-before felt love in the entire world.<br />
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You see. I have also been inlove with a character that only exists through books. So I really understand what you're going through for Im suffering from the same thing.<br />
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A cheers for me, you and all the other girls out there! Who knowS? Maybe we'll find someone greater than them . :))))

hi there! so i very thankful that im not the only one experiencing such a heartbreaking, never-before felt love in the entire world.<br />
<br />
You see. I have also been inlove with a character that only exists through books. So I really understand what you're going through for Im suffering from the same thing.<br />
<br />
A cheers for me, you and all the other girls out there! Who knowS? Maybe we'll find someone greater than them . :))))