Can't Stop missing him

all the time we didn't't talk , I knew he was with someone else so I wanted to  move on with my life watching movies and movie star crushes helped me to take my mind off of him, at least for awhile , there was this actor I laid my eyes on and have huge crush on .

When we started talking again, and saw his latest pictures on trips , with his mother , and saw how much he has grown since i last saw him, about three years , he is more handsome as he gets older ....even though his eyes looks pale and tired , but I just adore him the way he is .

one day i was watching the golden globe and the actor i have a crush on showed up t i gasped and my jaw dropped.
he looks so much to my friend, he has the same eyes as his, even the color is almost the same,

I have a crush on this actor and i didn't't even know he the older version of my friend.

i remember now when i was telling him about it and he asked me if i would still love him if he gets old .
i told him that i cant wait untill i see him old , that i can picture him with Grey hair on the sides  , and lines around his eyes when he smiles.

How much i wanted to be with him at that moment, my heart was about to burst wanting to see him .
now, the pain is more intense and deep, every time i see the actor's pictures, i remember him and the night we talked about it.

I am going insane here, even when i don't think of him , i fall for people who look like him and i don't even know about it.

when will I learn to stop missing him?
lonesomedove80 lonesomedove80
31-35, F
4 Responses Aug 3, 2010

This is a weird story that I can't relate to. Celeb's, sports figures, Gov't figures are all human - they are just recognized for certain talents that other's aren't.<br />
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Sounds like going to meet this person would put you on the front page of the LA TIMES....but with a mugshot.

Again, I find myself in your story, it`s funny :) In fact, I know this situation with actor crushes so well, I`ve been crushed for 4 years actually with a guy and then fell for a musician that, surprise, resembles him in every little way, phisically and mentally. And sometimes my heart still goes faster when I see people on the street that resemble him, in fact I think I have a radar for guys like that, then comes that stressful guilty voice in my head "you`ve done it again, fell for the same type again". I`ve met him closely, and tried my best to show myself to him in every way, but actually he didn`t seems to care. Weird enough, he has thi kind of behaviour of sometimes teasing me, sometimes totally ignoring me..playing games you know. Sometimes I wish he would know at least for a second what he meant for me. That`s it. I don`t expect him to jump in my arms.

I can afford it, its not about the money, its the fact that I can't go anywhere on my own.<br />
I wish I can go, but i am even scared to appear online to him when he is 7000 miles away from me.<br />
he is online at the moment , but i am scared to talk to him. and i hate the fact that I am scared because of him and how he can affect me this way.

You should find a way to actually meet him, so you know for sure, that all this pain is worth it. I know what you have with him is great, but REALLY knowing someone who you are in love with, is so much different. Maybe try and meet him! Find a way. I'm sure you could've saved the money, if that is the issue, over the years you've known him.