Age Really Doesn't Matter.

I'm a 19 year old girl and falling in love with a 41 year old man. It's so funny to say that because knowing me, the way I used to be, I would've never believed that I would even glance at someone that much older than me.

My story began at work, he was a new manager. I was drawn to him not by physical attraction but by his sense of authority and that "man" feel. I guess you can say I looked up to him, admired him for his work ethics. Of course I never thought it would ever turn into anything and I had a boyfriend at that time too. Work was work but I would always steal glances his way.
Somehow I befriended him on Facebook because of some silly application games. In the beginning we would only discuss about the games but as we started to talk more and more it got more personal and deeper. He had a girlfriend at that time and I had just broken up with my boyfriend. The funny thing is he had no idea how old I was and I wouldn't tell him. I would say to him "does age really matter?" "I want you to get to know me for Me and not judge me by how old I was". (He thought I was 28 years old LOL)
We would talk every night from 8-9pm till 4-5am, and we had so much to talk about and just such a good connection.
But of course, he still had a girlfriend and soon enough his girlfriend found out and of course, there were many problems.
Long story short, I tried to steer away from him, he also tried. but we always somehow just get back together.

Now, his girlfriend is on the verge of moving out and I can't wait to be with him.
He has truly made me WANT to be a better person (and he had said the same), he makes me think about my future, he's my motivation. My motivation for school so I can hurry up, get a career and be able to share my life with him. I feel like I want to be able to take care of him, love him. I want to kids with him, i feel so lucky right now, like I'm on top of the world just being with him.
He's such a smart, caring, sweet-loving man and we have the best of time together.

I really hope we work out because right now i can only see myself with him. but of course we have so much obstacles to overcome if and when we really get together. My family would have a Field day if they found out, lol.

Anyway, I've had my share of doubts and I still do in our relationship but as long as your honest to yourself and to him, you can overcome anything and make it work if you truly want to have it work out. :)

So for all you out there who have doubts or concerns, it's totally fine. Just be honest with yourself about your' feelings towards one another and you'll know if in the end it'll be alright. :)
dorii dorii
5 Responses Jul 11, 2010

I'm also 19 and I find myself falling deeper and deeper for a man who's old enough to be my dad... We're an interracial couple as well, so when we go out people tend to stare because we are such a contrast.

We are doing fine and are officially together too! :D<br />
his ex girlfriend finally moved out and were just moving on.<br />
Although we are together we still have many problems such as what happens if I go out with my friends or whatnot. Honestly though I don't think it's because of our age difference, I mean many couples argue about going out with friends, work, money, not because of our age gap. <br />
Not saying we don't have problems but were together and working it out together and that's what matters :D

this guy is taking advantage of you, his girlfriend isn't going to move out. and the fact that you are attracted to his authority is a huge red flag, have your fun but be ready for it to not work out.

this guy is taking advantage of you, his girlfriend isn't going to move out. and the fact that you are attracted to his authority is a huge red flag, have your fun but be ready for it to not work out.

I am so glad I found someone in nearly the same situation. I am also a 19 year old girl in love with a 37 year old man. We met at work pretty much close to how your story goes. He was new and at first I wasn't attracted to him until I got to understand his personality. I was very upfront with my parents and they actually understood...of course it was a huge shock at first. We got together and started dating and talking about a possible relationship a year ago...and I will let you know now a year later we are still together. We have had some rough times, but you can't stop love from happening. I am just looking for some support or I guess friendship with someone who shares a similar story. Hope your relationship has turned out to be great:)

I am in a similar situation... I am happy with him, but have completely messed things up with family. You're lucky to have family who is understanding. How did you work through that?