It Sucks.....a Lot

I know this sounds stupid buy its true. Theres this girl am i just crazy for shes my best freind ever for one thing. Heres the basics she is basically my dream girl ....and for someone reason she dosent hate me like even i do. She says she see's me like a big brother though she says she'd go out with me if she wasn't seeing someone. She's bassicaly a dream come true...except she has a boyfreind. He lives in florida ...and is 6 years older than her. I know he's a good guy proboaly but i cant help feeling like i do for her. she knows i like her but she has no idea how strongly i feel for her. its killing me that i cant be with her like i wish i could i wish i could tell her how i really feel but i could never do that to her. Plus i know she'd be happy with her boyfreind. ITS DRIVING ME INSANE. i litteraly cant sleep at night...well less than i ussualy do..which isnt much 2 begin with. I cant take anymore. i am totaly wild about her but i know it will never be. anyone know what i could do....i mean besides cry myself to sleep every night..join the army......or load up on pills. Every time we speak i fall for her more and at the end she says she loves me (in a best friend sense i guess) and i say it back ....the problem is that i'm actually in love with her and cant tell her. Then theres the whole i have no choice thing as much as i wish i could tell her I know if i do it wont change anything. It kills me that her boyfriend is going to visit her before i can...i suppose it wouldnt be as bad if he wasnt 6 yeards older than be honest thats one of the things that bugs me most.
CaptainJackass CaptainJackass
22-25, M
12 Responses Jul 22, 2010

ya... well its changed. shes not even with the loser anymore. the only problem is her current boyfriend lives near her and doesn't deserve her either. well i just know if i was over there no one could ever love her like i do now. she is truly my goddess :). i try to give her all that all the way from her too but the whole distance thing makes it complicated

hey, actually I just got engaged to the guy who felt this way for me. He showed me he respected my need to date a bunch of jerk offs before I could realize my heart when it stared at me from someone elses face. He was patient for 6 years, and then I realized that all I had ever wanted was for a man to treat me the way he did. Now I'm gonna marry him. The moral? Sometimes life just has to suck balls for a while, but through perseverance and trust in your heart, you CAN get that which you desire.

oh dont worry its completely different in a way now. i'm planning to visit her as soon as i can and i plan to be there for good soon enough. but for that other stuff.....its kinda complicated

I have exactly this... except I'm the girl and he's the guy, and we're both single. And yet I'm too scared. And, he's just moved 5000miles away. I missed my chance. Don't let what happened to me happen to you.

i give up.....theres no point in trying. Her boyfriends over there right now with her. it dosent matter anymore i give up its always meant to be. I'm supposed to be alone anyways. when i heard he was there my stomach actually began to twist like crazy and i thought i was gonna puke. I hate this so much but this is how its gonna be its the fourth law of physics i am meant to be alone. i've been drugging myself so i wont be awake cause it hurts to much to think/ excuse me i'm gonna go and return to doing that,.

take the chance, no more second guesses

thats the thing...a part of me wants her to feel that way about me but another dosent. She seems happy with the man shes with now and i know she could continue to be happy but if i confess everything to her then that might cause her pain the one thing i never want her to feel. besides even though she says its stupid that i hate myself theres a reason i have so much self hate....i deserve it.

Hi! <br />
you might just never know if you don"t take that chance and tell her you love her. life is too short to be wasting time wonder what ifs.<br />
just do it! spill it out. you might be surprise what that answer might be. good luck!!!!!

..... ya but i live just as far away only higher north. To be honest i have been working it slowly. I hit on her in a kinda jokingly kind of way. We had this thing which we would take turns asking each other questions and she asked me if she hinted at doing "the whistle thing" (not my word for it.... the health teacher at my old middle school said that i kid u not... before i got kicked out of that class) when i was with her how would i react i admitted i wouldn't last a second .. despite the fact i respect her and care for her so much that i have forbidden myself from thinking about her that way. then i asked her the same question and she after blushing more than i ever thought possible admitted if she wasn't with anyone then she say yes too. hell we have had erotic dreams about one another. i cant desribe how much i feel for her but its killing me that i'm not the man in her heart. Though it seems like she's been avoiding me lately ....the worst part is that shes moving to florida to be with him though i can sense that shes not certain in doing it...its driving me insane

Dude you gotta go after her. At least try to work it in slowly. Like start hinting at it. If not just go for it. the guy lives in florida. You only have one life so live it with someone you love. I can't exactly go after my girl, especially since feelings were established now were friends again. You still have a chance.

I know i will regret it later but shes happy with this guy as much as it makes me miserable not being with her i couldn't hurt her by telling her how i feel. It dosent matter if shes not with me as long as shes happy . A moment of happiness for her is worth a lifetime of feeling like crap. She knows i like her like that but has no idea how strong i feel for her. When we say good bye to each other and say she loves me and i say it back it makes me feel so good she means it as a best friend way but she has no idea what i mean when i say it back.

Fight for her. If you love her tell her. Don't let her slip away from you, because you will regret it later if you don't go after her. Good luck dude! ^_^