I'm Already Thinking About Her Birthday!

My "crush" 's birthday is on the 23rd Oct. She'll be 49 this year. I don't think in the six years we have known each other that I had ever forgotten to wish her happy birthday. Last year I helped my classmates and some of her co-workers plan a surprise birthday party for her. So, to make it appear as though I had forgotten and to not raise her suspicions about the party, I didn't contact her. However, during the party I made sure to let her know I remembered.

Earlier this year I had bought a very cheap Winnie the Pooh writing pad for her. I am aware that she was a fan and when I saw it, it just screamed her name to me. When I gave it to her though, despite her supposedly genuine gratitude, she politely detered me from buying anything more for her. Yes, and I know I have to respect her request. She chalked it up to me not wasting my money, but I feel it has more to do with her now being the dean of the department and not wanting to raise concerns and also not wanting to lead me on. Even though I insisted that it was not a problem she stressed that I did not have to do it.

However, I still want to give her something this year for her birthday; for the simple reasons that she remembered mine and has gone out of her way to reconnect with me. Last year she forgot my birthday and it was only after I deliberately wished a classmate of mine happy belated birthday (her's is the day after mine) in an email I sent to them all did my "crush" remember to wish me happy birthday. Granted the greeting came the day after this year, but knowing her, she probably didn't want to disturb whatever she felt I was doing.

Though she remembered my birthday this year I had made up my mind not to reciprocate because I wanted to not have any contact with her at all. Yet, because she has been so nice to me lately I will!

So seeing that I want to respect her wishes and keep my dignity; this year her birthday presnt from me will be a simple hug and a kiss. No ecard, no commercial present, no email. A HUG AND A KISS. DIRECT, GENUINE, INTIMATE AND PRICELESS! What more could she want?!

I am a dramatist at heart so the context in which she will get these "gifts" is still in the making. But I was thinking of waiting to see her pass by and telling her that when she puts down her stuff in her class I have something for her. When she comes back to me I'll just say "Happy Belated Birthday" (I will see her only after the actual day) give her a tight hug and a kiss on her cheek. I know she loves affection so she will appreciate it.

22-25, F
Sep 30, 2012