I Just.... Can't Even Anymore.

Today we had a fieldtrip. He drove our bus. For the pass two days I have COMPLETELY ignored him... It hurts so bad. :/
So I tried my hardest not to look at him and my friend watched him cautiously to see if anything happened... Well things did. He kept looking at me through the mirror on the bus and it looked like he s trying to get my attention. And then before we got off the bus I said, "I don't know why, but older guys are just so much more attractive. Maybe it's there authority...." I kinda laughed at the end and my friend was like, "you always get the guys you like, so why even try for this guy?" And I smiled and looked straight at Mr.S before we got off and said, "cause he's actually worth the try." I swear he smiled before I got off and I just could be more happy I got it off my chest.

During the last bus ride I kinda fell asleep but woke up and noticed he was staring at me. So I starting staring at him and he did so too and he would smile and nod a bit and look away and I would blush. Gahhhhhh he is soooo cute! And when I got off everyone was saying thanks to him for driving the bus and I was the last to get off so I was like, "Thanks..." And I looked straight at him and he was like, "no problem Rach..." And it was kinda awkward so he called after this girl who had cough drops (the poor baby is sick :/) and I just scooted away.

I was just so sad the past to days that when I got inside I lost it.... I started crying and everything. :/
Oh and yesterday he barely paided ANY attention to me and would even look at me so I decided to do the same! And we'll I think he kinda took notice... I'm trying to get teh courage to ask him if I can transfer to a different class. I hate/love being in his class but I can't concentrate on anything BUT him... Ugh.

Oh and I'm reading The Great Gatsby and he heard and I swore he smiled when he heard(: hehe
And I have a soccer game tomorrow so hopefully he will come even though I didn't tell him about it so.... Yeah. Bye wish me luck! :)
arcticray arcticray
18-21, F
3 Responses Nov 9, 2012

One advice i'll give you, don't play hard to get with him. SHOW HIM you care ya know? if he doesn;t look at you, so what? look at him anyway. if he's angry or upset, and ignoring, instead of walking away ask him whats up. :) Tell me how that goes. And is he married?cause he seems to be old. haha <33333

He's not married, he's 35 now :/ single and ready to mingle(; lol

Keep your head up butter cup <3

If only I could, I seem to be so down lately.

I know how you feel. It's gonna be ok

Ughhhhhhhhhh. Thank you bae(:

You are so lucky to be able to play soccer right now... I would do anything to be able to play soccer but I can't for a while and it is literally killing me!

Haha I actually love it(: I would die if I couldn't lol. I hope you are okay!!

Well define ok... I am dying without it... literally.. haha nah I will be fine... I am just a little beat up... they had to take me back to intensive care because they are doing a knee reconstruction tomorrow...:(

Get better! (:

I will hopefully!!


I really think you and him should talk about things!!

I don't know how... Like how would I say anything? He's mp been making me so nervous lately... What if he doesn't feel the same? Ughhh what if he DOES feel the same?

You need to ask him who he likes in private and depending on what he says then if it sounds like he likes you tell him how you feel if it doesn't then say awh and smile through the pain.

I can't just ask the man who he likes! That's like ughhhhhhhhh. And telling him how I feel? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH you are so funny I just can't even anymore. I already so smile through the pain every day. I wish someone had answers :/

Sorry I am just so sad today lol

Sometimes life is about taking a chance... what if he does like you but you never tell him how you feel? Ya'll will be secretly in love with the other forever but never knowing the others feelings. I told jake how I felt and look at us now!!

I know and I so envy y'all! Lol
But i am just so scared... And if he didn't love me back then it would be all awkward.. :/

True but he always acts like he does!!!

By ignoring me and constantly staring at me like he hates me?....... Ughhh

It's playing hard to get. Jake does that sometimes. The day before i was put in the hospital he didnt talk to me at all I tryed to but he just rolled his eyes and walked away for no reason!!!

Why??? He already had you!!!!!!

Because guys are just as moody and bitchy as we are they just have dicks instead of vagina's

Oh my, you are so hilarious(:
It's like PMS but for guys haha.

yep I told jake that i was like are you on your period or something and he was like oh my god cierra I don't have the time for this right now and walked away and i screamed after him i was like don't forget to change your tampon and then i walked away.

HAHA your life is like a sitcom.

Specking of my handsome little devil, he just walked through the ugly grey hospital room door haha!!! awh he looks so cute!!!! if i had my phone i would upload a pic but it got demolished in the crash but I can get him to say hey to you if you want me to!!

Can ou do me a huge favor and ask what he saw in you and why did he look past the rules and just came forth to love you? I know it's deep but I actually really want to know! It's so cuet(:


Hey this is Jake, Well to answer your first question. Cierra is different, she is for one thing like an energizer bunny, she is super wild and crazy and cute and funny and even when she is awkward or weird it makes me love her so much more. And to answer your second question, people do crazy things when they are in love, i would lose a million jobs if it meant I could be with Cierra...:) You should go for your man or better yet he should go for you!!!~Jake

Oh gosh, you are awesome. And that is just so sweet.... :)
I wish and trust me I want to but I'm just scared.
Have a good day guys, I'm heading to bed. Thanks Jake for answering my questions! I'll talk you, Cierra, tomorrow if you are up for it. Goodnight and have fun in the hospital(;

As much fun as you can have in a hospital room!!night :) sleep good talk to you tomorrow and jake said you are welcome and thank you!!

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