UncomfortableSo in Chemistry today Mr D was ranting on about how Justin Bieber fans have been self harming to stop him from smoking weed.
He was like "I don't understand why they would do that for a pop star? I dont understand why anyone would do it actually". And normally he looks at me for my opinion and I'll just smile if I agree.
But today when he looked at me I was nearly crying. I know it's not his fault because he doesn't know that I have depression and anxiety and used to self-harm; well I still do sometimes but thats a side of me he will never know or so I thought.
I couldnt look at him at first but when I did he was frowning and then changed the subject.
Then in the lesson he would just randomly ask if I was okay and I just nodded but I think he could see I was nearly crying. I'm ashamed of that side of me so when it sounds like he's disappointed it is even worse.
So i rushed out of the lesson at the end so he couldnt talk to me but I had to hand work in to my Physics teacher.
I went to the Science office but only he was in there :-/ I knocked on the door and when he looked up there was this cute little smile on his face and I was just like "Oh hi sir have you seen Miss C?"
And he said he hadn't so I asked if he could give her my work when she came into the office next so I gave him my work and he started reading it.
He was like "wow now i remember why I hated physics" and I laughed and he did his cute little grin. Then he was like "are you okay? You seemed a bit upset in Chemistry"
I just shrugged and said "I'm fine" and he said "well just let me know if you get upset again, it's horrible seeing you sad"
And then there was his cute smile that brightened up my day! :)