I never imagined that I would fall so much in love with a man from a different country. An ocean and thousands of miles separate us and still I have never felt such love for and from a man like he is with me. When we are in touch the miles disappear between us and we are joined as closely as a man and woman can be in this way. His love is amazing. Unselfish. Giving. Tender.
We have known one another for some time now and we both felt something so different when we started messaging back and forth. I found myself looking forward to every contact from him and would break into a huge smile whenever I saw a message from him. I knew that I had someone very special in him and that feeling keeps growing daily.
A few weeks back I remembered something that my aunt told me many years ago. She said that she saw me with a man with dark hair and I was so very happy. Then she told me that he was from far away. A different country but that we were together sharing a wonderful life! I then realized that she had been telling me about him! All those years ago she knew this.
Being so far apart brings up some concerns obviously. At times there is this little fear that obstacles are in the way. We are so in love and want to meet and be together and this time is coming for he is making plans to fly here and meet me. Thoughts of meeting became a belief and now an imperative for both of us. No questions about this. Sometime this fall we will finally meet after a year of falling in love and it will be wonderful. To finally see his face in person. To share that first hug and kiss. Laugh and talk. Make plans for a shared life.
Because we are so close emotionally, the separation becomes harder to cope with at times. I was feeling a bit down earlier this week. He could tell by the sound of my voice that I was feeling a bit blue and was very concerned about me. I love him even more for worrying about me so. And I worry about him too as he is going through a necessary emotional difficulty lately.
I shared my feeling of being a bit down with a dear friend here and she told me some very important things. The first is to have faith in him and I do. He is the best person I have ever known. He has never let me down and he never will. He has promised to always do his best for me and I promised to always do my best for him too.
The second thing my friend told me is to have hope. And I do have hope. My hope is that we will be together sharing our new life sooner than we expect. We have no doubts that we will share this life together but the time apart becomes harder for us both. So having hope for this being sooner rather than later is what we are hoping for.
The third thing I was told was to have trust and I do. I trust this dear man with my heart and our future. I trust him to follow his path to me. I also have told him that he never has to weigh his words with me. We have shared every thing so far and this will continue. For him to know that he can trust me is very important to me. I will never do anything to intentionally cause him any hurt or harm. He is getting little support for his present situation so I am the one that he can always turn to with the confidence that he can trust me with what is happening.
The last two words are my own addition. Respect is key to any successful relationship. Respect means that you are concerned about your partners feelings. That you understand their choices. That you listen with an open heart. Think things through for the growth of the other person joined to you in life. Give them the time to work things out and not force any issues for your own agenda but for the benefit of both of you. I have tremendous respect for this man and always will feel this way about him.
And then there is love. Love that brings two strangers together in a way that is amazing. Love that has grown over months. Love that has seen both of us through some difficult times. Love worth having. Love that joins two hearts from so far away as if we were in the same body. He sees in me things that no one else ever has. That I am strong but that a fragile heart beats inside of me. That I am passionate but somewhat reserved and shy with many people. Most people. That I love to laugh and bring laughter to his life too.
So when I get a little down I will remember these five words and feel better about our being apart for the present time. Together we share them all. Together we are at our best. And together we will make a life sharing all of these words and emotions. He deserves my best as I deserve his. And this is what we have. Our present and our future.