I Feel So Bad...

I am 15, and I have a boyfriend. I never did anything physically that would be called cheating but mentally I guess, it could be cheating. The problem is, I still have feelings for the guy that I liked before him. This guy I used to like, or I guess its more of an obsession that I cant get over... No matter how much I try. All I want is him.
Nobody really knows I want this guy so bad. They all think I am happy with my boyfriend. I really am not. I feel incredibly bad how I can't get over the guy.
I have liked him for maybe 2 years? He knew I liked him before cause numerous times I told him. My friends told me he wasn't worth it and tried to snap me out of it. It didn't work much. He, himself has told me that he isn't worth it for me. That I need to move on.
These conversations haven't happened for quite a few months. Mostly cause I kept my thoughts secret now that I have a boyfriend. I don't want to hurt anybody but in the end, I am suffering myself.
I know I am at a dead end cause either way I will be suffering. Secretly or for everybody to know. I feel really selfish or bad. But I know I need to get over the guy. But my heart won't let me.
I don't know what you could really respond... I just needed to vent and I want reassurance. Maybe your thoughts on the situation.
Annabellan Annabellan
18-21, F
3 Responses Dec 7, 2012

You don't sound like you are in love with this guy you are with or even happy with him so why stay in the relationship? Are you satying with him because you do not want to be alone and need that company, need to know that you DO have someone in your life? Or do you just need those feelings of affection that you two would share? You obviously are in love with the other guy but honey as he said you need to move on. He don't sound like he is interested in being in a relationship with you and you can't make someone love you so don't waste your time and energy on him. What I would advice you to do is take some time to really evaluate your feelings for this guy you are with, I suggest taking a break from him. During this time I suggest you both try and meet new people, if one of you happen to find someone else that you are more happy with then it was not meant to be. If it was meant to be then you both would have a greater appreciation for each other and your relationship. Good luck.

Heartache666 is right, if you are on a relationship is because that person is the one that makes your soul burn into passionate flames, the one who you want to be for the rest of your life (damn i'm so dramatic)<br />
if your boyfriend doesn't fill these, then end it.say: i fear i'm not loving you the way you deserve, you have to find someone who deserves you.<br />
and forget about the other, you are falling into a poisonous relationship and is an abyss difficult but posible to leave, just trust your friends

I seriously feel for you.
The guy your with now.
Is he the one you want to spend your time with?
Is he the one you want to call yours?
If not you need to end the relationship now.
Before you hurt him and yourself even more.