I am in love with a friend and colleague who is happily married to a woman he calls his soulmate (and she is beautiful and lovely.) There is absolutely no chance that he and I will ever be together, but I can't stop myself from dreaming about what life would be like with him. We are good friends, and he is definitely interested in me as a person, which doesn't help my feelings of attachment. I need to find a way to still be able to spend time with him, still be friends, without feeling like my heart is breaking every time I think of his marriage. At 45, I should be over these things.
brendabrenda brendabrenda
46-50, F
2 Responses Aug 17, 2014

I know it's hard. I've been in your position before. The only way I got through it was by thinking about it like this: you must realize he doesn't love you back in that way. If he loved you he wouldn't be with his wife. And why would you want to be with someone who doesn't love you? That's the hard truth, I'm afraid. You must come to understand that he is off the table and unavailable. You must open yourself up to meeting other single men! Go out and have fun. Let your hair down and use this experience to grow as an individual. Take some time to explore the world and explore your own interests and hobbies. As for your age - well, I truly believe love has no age. Sometimes it takes years to truly know the depths of our own heart.

It's about ages, it doesn't matter in you were 25 or 45, no matter how you say to yourself don't love him, if your heart says love then it is, you're a ground up woman and in love, I would like to say it's wonderful, but if the love like that your heart will break every time you think about it. Well I'm not the right person to say that, but try to forget about him, full your time with a lot of things, and I'm sure you'll find someone who will love you, only you, I know it's not easy, but give it a try, it'll hurt, but not as much the hurting this love will make in your heart, leave him to his wife, and if you have life with him you'll take it. I wish you a happy lovely life.