My boyfriend is a Muslim and am a Christain it kills me that I might never be with him. This is because his family wants him to marry a Muslim. I feel like this is unfair and an individual should marry who ever they want.In Islam a Muslim man can marry a Christian woman anyway but his family won't allow this.i like him a lot and sometimes I cry myself to sleep over the fact that I may never be with him because of this. I don't know what to do, I should really appreciate any advice .
shumirai shumirai
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 22, 2014

You can't control what you feel. If your boyfriend really loves you he will fight for you, I know how you feel..mine is much harder situation, i know he can't be my man...he's a married muslim man, but God knows how much I love the man in every day of my life..but i have to sacrifice my feelings for him even it almost kills me..wish you will end up together for sure, because you're both single..Goodluck!

I know right feelings just don't go really sorry about your situation as well.but God knows I hope you are okay

...i will eventually move on with another place I guess from there I can start to move on...but while I'm still around I am still communicating with him through phone conversations..only God knows how much i love the man...

You should ask yourself a question? What are you going to raise your children? The Bible says don't be unequally paired, this is true especially in spiritual matters. It also says how can two walk together if they don't agree? Now, I'm not telling you to do anything, but consider, when you wear his last name, life will take on a different meaning when you legally belong to each other, and all marriage does is amplify the cracks in a relationship that needs to be dealt with. And religion is a big thing. It would take a seriously mature relationship to let each one have their own religion and then give the children their own right to choose, but honestly, your setting yourself up for some bitter arguments or serious compromises you won't be happy about if you pursue marriage with anyone who spiritual values are not even based on the same contract (Holy Bible and Quoran).

And I'm sorry, these are only my opinions and this is only the voice of experience, and homegirl down at the bottom said you could convert to Muslim, and technically, he could convert to Christian also, but would you both be really doing it because you believe and are convicted of the value of life in that religion, or just doing it to be with that person and make them happy? If it's the latter answer, doing it for another human being, you won't be happy in the end.

I would not convert to Muslim for him at all that's how it is , because I guess that's when even more problems start because i would not have done it because I genuinely want to be part of the religion and he knows and understands that and that's goes the other way round .

I know that but even if I get married to a Christian how do I know they are really a good Christian anyway.some people just come to church with the wrong motives and not everyone who says they are a Christian are a Christian. A good example is my dad is dead now though. After getting married to my mum he cheated on her abused her did drugs and all sorts yet he was a Christian. I know everyone has flaws and stuff but I guess I won't marry someone just because we have the same religion. And also the bible says we should love everyone , and now it's confusing me why I can't be with the person I really wanna be with. I am really confused because there are people in my family who got married to people who aren't Christians but are still together , of course they have ha problems and stuff but they love each other and are still together.

Well, like I said, it absolutely can work, but please sit down and have an honest conversation with those relatives. Yes, the Bible commands us to love everyone, which I do, even your enemies. But loving a person and becoming one with a person are two different things. The Bible tells you thats its best for a believer not to outright marry a unbeliever because of the difficulties that can arise from that. You marry this man, and with the rise of Islam, especially ISIS, and other religions taking a stand, imagine if the pressure comes down on this guy from not only his family, but his community and then he begins to put pressure on you. A battle line will be drawn and eventually, somebody will crack. And again, not saying that is going to happen. It's not about marrying someone for the same religion, it's about marrying someone whose heart is on the same ground and foundation with yours. If the foundation isn't leveled equally, those problems will cause a home to crack. Now as far as your father, I'm sorry you had to experience that. But if you are going to present your father as an example, then I'd have to reply with the same. How do you know this man you are with won't one day snap and become what your father was? You may know him now, but you don't know if life will change him in an opposite direction. And again, you aren't married to him right now, in which no matter how long you've known a person, marriage always brings out a side you've never seen. Marriage and death are the two events you can't hold a poker face with. The truth and secrets will always come to light. All this being said, the Bible is a guide, and these are my opinions. I know it can work, and there will be good times, but there are unique miseries that comes with unique problems that can't be avoided. And as to your father, when it comes to choosing your husband, this is the one situation you have a right to be a lawyer about, and question everything about a man until you put a ring on. Your happiness and your life is at stake, and whatever life you choose, just remember, God will always let you have what you want, whether it is His plan or not. He won't stop you, and I'm not saying you shouldn't, I'm only a man. I'm just saying... to think of the consequences all the way through. Marriage is like a web, it's easy to get caught in, but hard as hell to get away from, especially when it's miserable.

Yeah I understand what you mean , and has just made me see the other side too

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You both believe in god. What's the big deal?

It's the fact that we don't practise the same religion

Learn their language

Even if I learn their language , am still gonna be a Christian so they might not accept me still

It helps, believe me. Are they Arabs?

No they are from Pakistan

So they speak Urdu or Hindi, very nice language.
where are you yourself from?

Am from England , am not sure what language they speak because my boyfriend speaks English

You don't even know what language your boyfriend speaks and you claim you love him?!!!

He speaks English only , his never talked in another language

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