A Year Later And Still Not Too Bright...
oh, dear love of my life from "i loved someone who didn't love me..." i am still insane.
i saw him again last night... not much has changed. it's amazing how everything changes and nothing changes.
i thought the reason he was not interested when we reconnected last year was because i was very overweight. i have lost 100 lbs in the past year. i am actually a healthy weight and he referred to me as "skinny" yesterday. we were intimate like we've been for the past several months. i can still feel his touch on my neck and my legs and my body and i have butterflies thinking about him and his sweet lips and i know... nothing has changed. i cannot stop feeling this way. i am so in love with this man.
i know that a lot of this is my fault. i won't leave my current unsatisfying relationship. i probably never will... well, until i get caught. then my love will realize that he REALLY doesn't want to be with me and i shall be alone... and it will be my fault.
but for now i continue to love him.