The Beginning of the End?

My doctor "thinks" I am perimenopausal, and he expects me to know what all that means.  Oh, I understand that I will stop having periods, that I need to consider HRTs, that I will have hot flashes and be *itchier than usual.  But is this also why I am having pimples?  And gained 30 pounds that I cannot lose despite daily exercise and a healthy diet?  Does this have anything to do with the bilateral joint pain I have had for most of the past year?  Or the fact that my fasting glucose was 111?  I am real frustrated with the medical community:  They won't tell you anything, but they are offended if you do your own research.  anyone else know what I am talking about?
alisarosenbaum alisarosenbaum
46-50, F
10 Responses Oct 25, 2007

I am sorry you had this experience and i hope you have found yourself a new doctor that is willing to talk and answer your questions.
When I visit my doctor I usually have a list of questions that I make sure to ask while I have her/him in the room with me.
Thank you for sharing this and I hope you now have a Great physician

Yes! They act like you are slighting them if you know anything about yourself even though they don't care! They are trying to protect themselves more than they are trying to help us! I can relate!

I think the reason is because they can not tell you how this will go for you. It is such a unique season for each woman.

When we share with each other, maybe someone will say something that you try that helps for a while. Then, suddenly, it changes again.

Each woman is going through a unique common experience. It is dynamic. I had excessive bleeding, progesteron worked to fix it two years ago, but this time, two years into this dance, it is not working. I tried black cohash.

Nothing is working now to stop it.

The doctor's cannot,tell you what will happen, because they don't know. They don't like people to be fully aware of this because we can barely afford them anyway and who wants to pay 70.00 to someone who tells you they don't know.

That is why they suggest hysterectomy, and ablation. They can remove stuff and stop it that way. Our natural process is this out of control storm.

Us sharing our stories, suggestion, empathy, kindness is the way we can pass on knowledge to and for each other. I do feel insane at times, but life is full of insane movements. We will get through this.

I hope women who have already been through this reach out to us. I wish we could talk more openly about menstrual issues of any stage. It affects women. It affects our jobs, our relationships...and yet,everyone acts like it isn't happening.

Please try anything other than a regular, western MD. I needed to go to a chiropractor, Doctor of Oriental Medicine and Doctor of Osteopathy to find answers and helpful healers who wanted to help me! Please try this.

It's just over 2 years since I last commented here. I am still using PROGEST cream and although my symptoms are shifting, I get great relief using this cream. When my diet is 'off' and I indulge in sugar and crappy foods, I feel worse symptoms. When I eat plenty of salads and veggies, drink plenty of water, I feel ok almost all the time. I'm 46 now and have missed 3 periods in the last 2 years. I hope this community is supporting and comforting you as you experience this part of the journey.

I truly believe that the only valuable information at this point comes from other women going through the same thing. I have read some books and gone to some doctors that are not only not helpful, but downright insulting about this whole experience. Happily, the women on this site are amazingly open and helpful. I found a great doctor, finally (a women my age, of course. I should have known) I also found a great book ("A Strange Period") that contains lots of short, funny, helpful, interesting, and extremely informative stories from perimenopausal women along with extremly helpful "things to try" for a variety of topics related to physical symptoms, changes in brain function, and even sexual issues. it's really comprehensive. I have recommended it to a lot of friends, who seem to like it, too. Really, the only thing we can do is help each other at this point.

Read my stories and you will see that you are not alone in the frustration you feel for doctors and their lack of anything that will truly help. You'll also see that you are not alone in the feeling and symptoms you have. Let me know if I can help at all...

Hi Alisa, please read what I said in "It is gonna be OK"<br />
<br />
Emerita "Progest" Progesterone cream. Natural, easy and IT WORKS. Available online at for less than $25.<br />
I have been getting it at the health food store for $45. <br />
<br />
Also please read my comments in the other 8 stories in this group so far.<br />
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Find a naturopathic doctor. Go to a good health food store like Whole Foods. Look online for natural perimenopausal and menopausal remedies, vitamins, supplements and diet alterations to get LOTS of RELIEF.<br />
Or email me.

Although I am a male and not experiencing the female stuff, I can agree that the medical community does not talk to us on our level. Maybe they think they can protect themselves if they talk above us. I handle my doctors and I will keep them with me using their time until they explain to me what they are saying, but I also do my own research first and after and don't usually consider their opinion to be the last word.<br />
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And yes, it does sound to me as if you are experiencing the effects of the "change". Men have that too, with lover testosterone levels, but our changes are different (obviously). Suggest you look into herbal remedies. The medical community will tell you it doesn't work, but I have known many women who find solutions here.

I have no problem with the menopause label, but the symptoms stink! I just want it over with! And while it is true that a "mere male" does not know about these things, the fact that you offered reassurance & supports earns you kudos in my estimate!