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The Worst Time In My Life!!!!

Omg the way i feel is so bad, i can't stand feeling this way.  I don't even want to get out of bed in the mornings, and is not that i want to sleep because i can't even sleep at night. I have have chronic insomnia and is taking a toll on me. I feel so exausted and with no energy and i feel like all day. I feel so miserable and i am so sick of being sick.  The panic attacks, anxiety, fatigue, imsomnia, difficulty breathing, hot flashes, night sweats, body aches, headaches, chest pain,  0 sex drive, difficulty concentrating, long periods lasting 2 weeks and sometimes longer , these are many of the symptoms i have been having for a while now. I will be 45 in November and the only thing my Doctor says to me is that i am probably going through the change. I had blood work done to check my hormone levels and all the tests came back normal which is not surprising because the week i had my blood drawn i was going to start my period so the levels were going to be normal according to my Doctor. But i feel so exausted, physically and mentally drained. I have been prescribed so many different medications for my insomnia and nothing helps, i will actually fall asleep but i will wake up in the middle of the night and i will be wide awake the rest of the night. In the mornings i feel so tired and exausted with no energy at all.  I just want to lay in bed and not do anything.

Yesterday i went to an herbal store and picked up some capsules made of black cohosh, blessed thistle, eleuthro root, chaste tree berry, sarsaparilla, and squawvine. Is a menopause mix and is supposed to balance female hormones and reduce the menopause symptoms, so i am going to try them and see how it goes, but i just wanted to share this experience with you all and hopefully we can all help each other through  this journey.


                                  Take care everyone,


                                                                                    Mrs B

mrsb1165 mrsb1165 41-45, F 39 Responses Apr 9, 2010

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I have had my fair share of BAD Doctors. Ive experienced exactly what you are going through and still have it happen part of the time. I have worked in the health care field for years until I couldnt work anymore! First Off, get yourself a FEMALE Dr. that is in the know about the new medications and creams for hormonal imbalance and depression that is going on with you. I have horrible bouts of depression and I ask my family to please help me, they don't, so it takes me DAYS to be able to go online to find help. Doctors are not God, don't treat them as such. Keep looking for a doc that uses the topical creams and changes your diet and Ive heard SO many good things about these types of treatments. Ive had a full hysterectomy and I was on esterdiol, but I had to go off because my body created bloodclots in my lungs after a back surgery. Your best option is to educate yourself on your problems. I know that is a hard thing when you are exhausted and feeling the way you do. This CAN get better! I too lied in bed for almost 10 years with an uncaring Dr.! God Bless You! You can get the strength to do this!

I don't know what to do with myself, truly. Cant sleep, ever, haven't been out if bed for 9 weeks, massive sinking feeling in stomach, bags under eyes no energy to do make up or even load the dishwasher- what the hell is this torture?

Omg! I found this site due to my on going depression and misery. I googled estrogen and/or peri menopause because I was told I'm in the beginning stages. I'm miserable!!! I might have one good week a month if that. I feel like a miserable piece of crap. I'm 39, I have twin 5 year olds by way of Invitro Fertilization. I feel like I never catch a break. 2 years into my girls being born I was diagnosed with Hashimoto Disease and I have never felt the same since. I told my husband I think we should split up because I'm in capable of affection and love. I sit here unable to type or correct my spelling because I'm so tired, depressed, no edge, irritable, miserable, fatigued etc etc. I just had surgery on Monday to remove 2 polyps on my uterus. The doc did a D&C. It's never ending with symptoms and misery. I can't even conjure up enough energy to cook a meal. Someone tell me how this is living! How is this fair!!! Women have it so hard. After my Hashimoto Thyroid diagnosis in 2011 I have never felt that great but as of last year 2013 or so I have never felt worse. My thyroid levels are fine so now it's my Estrogen and progesterone levels. Nothings been proven yet, but my Invitro doc said last year he believes I'm in the beginning stages of Pre-Menopause and PMDD. It sucks to not have zest for life, to be annoyed by your kids or husband. I'm a energetic go getter or atleast I was and now I can't even keep up when someone walks along side of me. I workout (Crossfit) but that only drains me more, it should be making me feel awesome but instead I'm wiped of all energy by the time I get the kids from Kindergarten. I'm rambling on. I 'm so over this. I'm depressed about everything. Nothing is making me happy. I'm sorry all you ladies are having the same issues, it plain sucks. I want to take my cats and run away to a quite place. That is not life ;-(

If it weren't for other women complaining of similar things, I think I wouldn't be here now. At 40, and it seemed overnight, I changed from being an outgoing, healthy and happy Mom of two children, into a person I no longer recognise. It began randomly in December 3 years ago when i went to A&E, I couldn't breathe, my heart was pounding, I was shaky and felt weak.. Hooked up to ECG and had bloods taken, only to be told, 'You had an anxiety attack'. I hadn't been feeling anxious before this, but had to accept the diagnosis. Then, for the next three years and up to and including today, I have visited the doc numerous times, it seems with a different ailment everytime (they are all real to me, I feel like I do, I can't fake how I feel). I had right sided pain on and off, and still do. Its a nagging horrible pain that takes my breath away for a few moments when it throbs, so I have had the ovarian cancer test, two ultrasounds of my abdomen and nothing showed. The pain came and went but I soldiered on, having been told there was no explanation for the pain. My cervical smear and swabs were also clear, my ovaries a normal size and cervix fine. Then began the other symptoms. I had tingling fingers and toes, felt dizzy and shaky, had a headache everyday, periods watery and pink and every 23/24 days. I developed gastric issues, at one point, even a glass of water would send my stomach inflating like a balloon and I had permanent indigestion and nausea. To top it off, I then had diarrhoea every morning for almost three months. By this time, I was convinced I had bowel cancer and cried to the doctor who referred me for a colonoscopy. I prepared for the worst, despite the doc telling me she felt it was highly unlikely that I had cancer. Colonoscopy and biopsies all normal and then the diarrhoea stopped. (Could I have had a parasite? No stool sample ever done). In between waiting for colonoscopy I had numerous blood tests for everything, liver and kidney function, cholesterol, thyroid, B12, Vit d, etc, etc,, all came back as normal, my iron levels were ok and white blood cells normal. The doctor prescribed me Prozac, I read the leaflet and didn't take them as there was no way I was going to risk feeling worse or psychotic!She kept repeating the old anxiety thing to me, I explained that I was anxious because I didn't know what was wrong1 I suggested perimenopause, she laughed it off, said I was too young (by that time I was 42). She did a FSH test, she said I was fine. My periods are becoming a little out of sync, a day or two off, and a mixture of heavy clots or watery blood (?) I get period pain, aches and pains in my joints especially in the morning, I have bouts of plantar fasciitis, breast tenderness like never before, an almost permanent sore throat, varying in how sore, and the air hunger, well now thats another story. I went back regarding that, having convinced myself I have lung cancer or something. More bloods, all fine, she listened to my chest, all clear, she sent me for lung funcion tests - my lungs are 'super normal' and oxygen sats are over 97% too. Peak flow readings all normal or above. So now, here I am, still feeling awful, still with the air hunger, fatigue, etc, etc, (I am boring myself here)... and still with no cure, no answers, and can't see an end in sight. It brings me so much comfort to read these pages, it helps to know there are others in this boat and I am not as alone as I constantly feel. Keep telling us your experiences, and Love to you all xxx

I feel your pain...I'm so miserable. I'm 39 and feel 70! I do workout to keep in shape but I can't get my salt cravings down so I counteract my working out with eating late night. I just don't give a crap some days, more days then not. My heart palps and beats heavy every night, I can't sleep either, I'm depressed, fatigued like a ton of bricks, I'm annoyed of my family life (which is amazing and I should be happy), My husband and are like roommates because I have no affection toward him, I don't want to have sex or even be touched. I've never bee overly affectionate due to past trama as a child, but him and I certainly had have much better days. I feel like running away. I hate everything, I keep wanting to do some drastic change (like move to Manhattan or go back to school for another career) when deep down that is just to mask my issue. I wish there was a happy pill (legal and not Some times I feel like a loser because I stay at home for my kids but then I think I can't even leave the house some days how could I accomplish more. I have had a nice career and college in the past so it's all in my dam head. I don't know what to do. Sorry you feel crappy as well

Hi Ladies, I defiantly know what you are all going through.
I am 47 and I had the exact same symptoms, had all test done from head to toes. I was given so many different medications from so many different Doctors and Specialist. Spend so much time and money, but I didn’t care I just wanted to know what was wrong with me. So after loosing 20kg in 5 months and Google every site I could find I diagnose my self OH I HAVE MENOPUSE. My hormones were all over but the blood test came back that there was nothing wrong with my hormones. So went to my Doctor told her that I wanted to go on HRT (hormone replacement therapy) yes I read all the negative side effects that this drugs have but I at this point I was willing to try anything. OK no problem took KLIOVANCE for eight days but was not doing much for me. So went back to the doctors and change to LIVIAL generic name XYVION (TIBOLONE) it’s a bit expensive $54 AUS. I have been on medication for 5 days and already I see so much improvement in myself. Believe me I have tried it all from vitamins to home remedies & Naturopaths. I can eat & sleep still have some hot flushes early in the morning but not as bad. My symptoms to name a few were crawling, itching, or tingling skin sensations Depression and/or anxiety Fatigue Irritability Memory loss, and problems with concentration Mood disturbance, Sleep disturbances, poor or light sleep, insomnia, and daytime sleepiness Back pain Joint pain, Muscle pain, Digestive problems including IBS, nausea you name it I had it, and so many other symptoms. So my personal experience is that if this medication is helping me and has helped others I was glad that someone told me about it so GLAD. I will let you know how my progress is going in the next month so I am keeping my fingers cross that I will see more improvement. Remember that you are not alone.

I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU. .I have just joined. I got sick almost two years ago. .still not myself, Dr have diagnosed me with everything. .and all I'm hoping for is that I get healed/healthy. .so I can drive and be independent again. . Just be myself, healthy, we'll nothing missing nothing broken..I don't think it's anxiety/panic attacks. . just would like to know what happened? ?, no one has just told me that, and not a Dr. Has mentioned menopause, we're going broke with all these co-pays, and all these different dr.'s..

Oh and I'm 54

You sound like me talking..I seriously feel like im going crazy.. It is awefull

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Oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one. I am 41 years old and I am going through the exact same thing. The doctor says I am post menopausal and I can attest that they have you on so much medicine and none of it works. I stay up some nights until 4 or 5 in the morning. It is awful; there has got to be something. I wake up sweating and then crying; I literally can't go anywhere when my cycle is on it is so bad.

Omg i am 50 years old and i am going thru everything you just mentioned except for the bleeding sometimes i will bleed real light for 2 to 3 days and other times i started out bleeding light then it will get heavy and stop but everything else is the same i am so sick of feeling sick and sometimes i just feel really strange like im hear but not here and i will feel weak its just crazy and i cant stand it!!!!! Lj

Same deal. Found this site because have been experiencing anxiety attacks and chest pains as new symptoms and my heart was checked recently so it's all good . And didn't know that these panic attacks and feeling bad could go with it. I had one day last week where I felt so bad physically and mentally I didn't leave bed. BUT for the most part losing weight , diet, and exercise, many vitamin supplements and fish oil have made me feel pretty darn good. The BEST thing was using compounded bio identical testosterone cream my doctor prescribed . My testosterone was low 16. It should be around 40. Ladies GET this checked. What a difference in energy and depression and sex drive and dryness. I have been using it a year and no side effects. You need testosterone too and it helps balance things. Also try to find a new outlet something new to be involved in and do. I've got probably ten more years of this at least to get through. Hang in there !

How old are you

Sounds just like me!! God bless

I know what you mean.... I always feel a mess... They only time I feel good is when my period is here because like you said hormone levels are normal around that time.... It should be something we could take to shock hormones back in order.. It's a very bad feeling and I hope and pray that it gets better for us all!!


I have a lot of the same symptoms at 52 - at 50 my insomnia was so bad that I couldn't really work - I am now on the vivelle dot and prometrium which I buy at a Canadian Pharmacy cause its cheaper than Costco even w/insurance - I must say that 90 % of my symptoms are gone - I also went to a psychiatrist who put me on 2 mg. of Ativan for sleep - these things really worked for me - I sleep every night, and don't have sweats - the wierd breathing thing I still have - but off and on - seems to be hormonal because it goes w/ my cycle. I use a tegaderm patch on my vivelle 1.0 - the strongest dose available - so that it holds the estrogen in while I shower which I only do twice a week before I change the patch so that I don't compromise my estrogen - hope this helps someone

Hi Ladies well what can i say last year it hit me like a ton of bricks perimenopause
we things were happening before but did link them with it . muscles sore joints aching , out of breath and the bloating, feels like some one took over my body and is having right rave up in it . peroid coming and going, and then heavy. every have one good month then something else starts. before i do get period get flu like symptons and fatique sometimes is terrible you have to put your mind in gear and push yourself to do things , anyway Ladies well keep up the the chin up or chins and skin another story for another day lol

omg I am 47 and I don't have periods anymore. but I can get so mean and night sweats and no sleep. I tried drinking to self medicate I am going to get some help finally but its driving me crazy and over the edge.

Me too

Oh thankyou for posting! You have the exact same symptoms as me but the only thing is, my doctor wont say its early menopause; just anxiety. Im 41 and i feel like i want to jump out of my body constantly. I have panic attacks, anxiety, shortness of breath, chest pain, stomach bloating. Just feel like im dying without a cause. Hope this doesnt last long.

I feel like that also. I was prescribed Brupropion Twice daily 2 years ago for Anxiety. Seems to help some physical symptoms, but I still feel it is peri-menopause. Went for the hormone test last year after missing period for 3 months and bam got my period so hormones seemed fine. Go through periods of time where I feel like a million bucks and then whammo in bed all day with weird symptoms, chills, sweats, body tingles, dry mouth, muscle aches. This was my past Saturday. I am in a stage right now where I have not had a period since May 7th. Last Monday I wiped and had the lightest brown on the toilet paper so I thought yay I got my period. Then extremely minor brown spots for 2 days and nothing. I get the weirdest symptoms and then 2 days later they are gone. Have thyroid condition
and Type 1 Diabetes but all levels are in check. The anxiety is extreme when I get these symptoms. My doctor has suggested some hormone pills, but I would like to have a positive hormone test that tells us that I am out of whack. I am an energetic, active, positive person and on the days when I have those symptoms and episodes it is like I am insane. Any advice would be great.Jen

I just joined experience project I was looking for a site to communicated with and so I typed in peri menopause and I read you story so I joined, I am so new at this once in a lifetime change, I feel so alone, but since you have writtin this in 2010, maybe I am to late to ask your advice what helped you and how are you now?

I'm 49 and went 72 days without a period then poof, back to the store for tampons. Peri has turned me into an anxiety-ridden hypochondriac. I drag myself to work and think "I must be seriously I'll". I've had full blood panel, liver function, pelvic ultrasound, chest CT, EKG, urinalysis, you name it --all normal. Periods are getting lighter, but my symptoms are in addition to fibromyalgia, so I feel like death. I look in the mirror and my eyes are tired and red / puffy, weight gain, bloating, urinary urgency and no sex drive. Mornings are the worst with unimaginable body aches and stiffness. I keep praying for strength and pushing ahead. Bought a Nutri-bullet and started having a green drink daily, and it does help a bit with energy. I also take Ativan for panic / anxiety which is outta control. Women have gotten through this since the dawn if time, and we will too. God bless us all!

Oh i have the health anxiety too!! Every test and im still not convinced i dont have a heart issue. I have chest pains and dizziness and shortness of breath and i dont get it. Im still here though lol

Hi Mrs B did the herbal mix help

Can't help but think transitioning into menopause is the worst experience ever. Night sweats were very few . I actually think the heat in the room was too high as to why I was sweating. Memory loss yeah sometimes I can't remember crap !! .. I'm 52 years old I feel like the oldest person in the world not to have reached the final stage of menopause. For the past 10 months I've had only 3 cycles . When I missed 2 straight months I thought I was home free . But the cycle is here as of today I have been on this cycle for a full 30 days and it's not even lighter or seem to be slowing down. All my bold was fine . Iron was slightly low , but the doctors say I'm probably just going into menopause . My stomach bloats with even the smallest amount of food. And I feel full even tho I'm still hungry !! .. I'm depressed to the max! I just want this phase to be over : ((

Omg you described all my problems to a T. Can someone who's 32 be going thrugh this.? This has been going on for years.

Yes! All of the women in my family (except me) were completely finished with menopause at 40.

hi there.i feel the same way.i have been like it now for 10 years.i dread waking up as i know whats in front of me.i feel so tired the mornings are the worst time,i have tried all sorts from the herbalist but nothing seems to life as altered so much.just want it all to go away and let me live a normal life.when will it all end.

OMG I know the feeling and it truly does suck please let me know if that capsule works for you I need something safe to take since I have heart arrhythmia disease. I am 41 and I feel terrible hot flashes ,shortness of breath, anxiety , and vaginal dryness etc.


I am 48 and i was having a lot of the issues you have. My traditional doctor only prescribed me Xanax, the only way I found any relief and help was by seeing an integrative doctor. With lifestyle changes such as diet and adding supplements and herbs my symptoms are manageable.

hi im sorry you feel that way. I totally understand how you feel im going threw the same thing all the same symptoms. I Hope everything you are going to try will help relieve your symptoms please keep me updated.

I am 45 and for the past 6 months I have been really tired and my periods have gone from a spot on 28 day cycle to anything from 21 day -28 day cycle plus I feel really sick during the unrest two days of my period, I am constantly hot during the day but don't seem to have the sweats at night.. I have found taking Berrocca once a day slightly helpful for the tiredness during the day.. I too don't really get much sleep at night either but that's down to cant get comfy and up 2-3 times to the toilet, I am n extremely active person.

I am with you girlfriends! Have been experiencing it for 6 months now, just got symptoms out of the blue. Tried Zoloft, made me worse, XANAX is the only thing that has helped as of yet. Has anyone experienced any relief with something NATURAL?

Yes, natural progesterone cream (for lots of symptoms) and Valerian root capsules or tea for a sleep aid help me.

I am 41 and experiencing all the same symptoms you mention. I stopped smoking 6-months ago (cold turkey) after 26 years because I just wasn't feeling good and thought the smoking was beginning to take its toll.........ppffffttt never felt worse!!!! The joint pain I'm experiencing is so debilitating, along with chest pain, pain in my kidney area and the tiredness is ridiculous. I've seen a rheumatologist (eventually) who said all the results for rheumatoid arthritis, vascularise, hep B etc were all normal as we're my hormone levels. My periods have become so much heavier and longer. I am also an emotional wreck which I have absolutely no control over and can last for hours at a time. My dr had diagnosed me with anxiety/depression and put me on anti-depressants. I went for counselling and on testing 3 times the counsellor advised me there was no sign of depression just anxiety - yes that's because I'm anxious about my symptoms and no one taking me serious that I have given myself anxiety. Who would be a woman??!

The anxiety is due to hormones. Im 100% sure. I have chest symptoms too. My hormone tests were normal too but they will be normal closer to your period. I will just keep driving my doctor nuts for however long this takes to stop.

I have been going threw this for a few months it started out with a cyst on my left ovary because I did not ovulate doctor put me on all types of hormones I could not take them due to terrible side effects. I think somthing is wrong with me all the time sick to my stomach. Panic attacks does not even begin to say what I am going through. I am on natural pro-gest you can get at any health food store helps some not much. Not sleeping all night tired draging tired I CAN NOT TAKE THIS MUCH LONGER DEPRESSED FEELING OUT OF SORTS DISCONNECTED. PLEASE HELP

I am in the same boat ladies. I am trying so hard to push through it. I am depressed. I have gained 4 + inches around my middle in the last year (plus unattractively redistributed excess everywhere else too). I am totally exhausted every day. Zero energy. Trying to exercise (which every site about menopause I read says how important that is ~ and I know it is for health reasons ~ but NONE of them explain WHERE the ENERGY to do that can possibly come from). I feel OLD, wrinkled and tired! Day in and day out, I just DON'T feel GOOD!! I am 47 years old, single and feel completely put out to pasture. My blood tests reveal I am definitely in menopause. Right now I am trying Estroven Energy. I have been on it for two weeks and, honestly, I think it is making my hot flashes and night sweats WORSE. I guess I am lucky, I am probably getting around 3-4 hours of sleep a night but by 1 or 2 AM, the sweating/freezing cycle starts until I DRAG myself out of bed at 6 to try to get 30 minutes on the treadmill. Dating or SEX???? Thing of the PAST. I don't feel desirable or attractive. Don't date, don't even go out anymore. I hate feeling this way and being so negative. I am falling further and further behind with things I need to take care of at home. I have no energy or no interest in anything! I HATE THIS FEELING!!!! I am afraid to try HRT because I dread the thought of it making things better for awhile and then when I go off of them, things being WORSE than they are now. The doctor isn't suggesting much either. I am so frustrated and upset ALL THE TIME!!! I feel for all of you going through this. I thought by this point in our lives, we would be looking forward to our periods being over with. I think I would rather keep that then go through all of the negative effects of THIS! Thanks for reading my vent. I have little support from anybody at home :( Doesn't make getting through this any better. And there's no way of knowing how many YEARS this could last!!!

I am also 47, I will be 48 this December..i have most of the same symptoms you do. I gained winter weight this past dec., feel like crap, don't have sex often is like I just shut down. ******* are difficult now..sometimes I have to really concentrate or else nothing happens. My husband always says he loves me for whatever I look like..he is such a great guy, but I feel like a whale. I had thyroid tests already..all normal, bloodwork-normal. I had an ultrasound recently internally for my uterus because my periods were so irregular. they said they found a polyp? or something but wanted to do another. I was so uncomfortable with the experience I didn't go back plus they charged me for the ultrasound when my ins. co. said it was covered! (another long story). You are not alone.. My next step is trying to lose the weight and eat better. I told my husband I wanted to try the T-25 program but he had to do it too. I know at this age I cant do it alone! I think I do have adult adhd which doesn't help the situation. My gut is huge, my butt is huge, my life is out of whack and I am almost 50. If I don't change something, I will go nuts. So I say, I have to start somewhere. I don't want to be on any pills if I don't have to be. All dr's wanna do is put you on a pill for this and a pill for that. So eating healthy and exercise is where it has to begin and then take it from there. Plus cancer runs in my family and now I am starting to really worry about that. Start by making yourself feel good on the inside and work on the outside after that. Something has to give, right?? Don't lose hope.. I am trying not to..

I am so glad I found this web site.I am having all the same symptoms! I am 51 and am pre-
menopausal according to blood test.I'm so sick of fighting this and can't seem to find anything to help.Have you found anything to help you?

Hi ,

Gosh , what you have written could be me !!!

I am also 45 and have been like this for around 2 yrs . It started off feeling exhausted all the time literally dragging myself around and my periods became irregular . As i felt shattered i kept going to the doctor until finally a blood test result came back and they realised i am going through the change ( apparently it is very hard to pinpoint the FSH levels ) . Well , i shouted for joy i felt that at last something could be done to help . I started on HRT , can"t recall the name of it but its a more natural one and for the first 2 weeks i felt fantastic but then boy did i feel dreadful ( worse than usual and i did not think that was possible ) ... so i came off those . Then tried a synthetic one with much the same result ... am now going to see if i can try patches . I never in my wildest dreams would have thought that the change could make you feel so terribly ill . I have insomnia usually manage approx 2-3 hours a night ( even that is broken sleep ) , awful joint pain , hot flushes beyond belief , irritability , memory loss , lack of concentration , breathlessness , chest pain ... the list just goes on . Am sick and tired of literally dragging myself around on auto pilot feeling like a zombie and too tired to show interest in anything . Its a very sad experience which gets you down , i am at the point where if i could afford to stop work i would and could just lie on my bed all day ... and this is someone who has always been full of energy and always on the go full of life ... it is a complete shock to feel like this .

I hope your menopause mix works and i am interested to know if it helps

I Angel is my real name I have been in bed for almost three years. I can't get insurance cause I have bad kidneys. I have tried everything but OTC drugs which is next I can't walk across room without being soaked head to toe. I was raped at 37 and it all started. I am 41 now. I can't tell u how many times I've had a gun in my mouth. I did succeed in killing myself once cause I have a lot of other health problems. They brought me back. The last time I had my gun in my mouth something said no just drop it and pray so I did and cried like a baby. I was prom queen, I modeled in college, I never weighed more than 120 well now I weigh
I can't work out cause my temp Goes to 104. I'm waiting on Obamacare for surgery. I just wanted u to know I have all the same problems

GET YOUR THYROID tested ASAP......if your thyroid is out of whack......everthing you mentioned is out of whack.

Mrs. B...just came across this site. How are you doing now?