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How Do You Know For Sure?

I think on some level I have always know that I am gay.  The earliest attraction that I can remember having towards another person was towards this girl with the most beautiful long blonde hair in preschool.  The next was on this neighbor girl that explored the ways of kissing and ************ with me.  In college I got drunk enough at a party to actually kiss a girl but later she blamed it on the alcohol and so did I.  But how do you know if you are truly gay if you have never actually been intimate with a woman.  I think about women all the time...I see two women kiss on tv and almost start crying because I am jealous of them.  I see people on tv come out their families and the families support them with open arms.  I guess my main issue is this...what if I come out to my family and friends and I don't know for sure if I am gay.  What if I am cut off from the people I love because of something I am not sure of for myself.  I want what everyone else does in life...to find the person they can't live without and will love forever...but how do you know if that person is supposed to be a man or a woman?

sparkstar sparkstar 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 10, 2008

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I found out I was gay in a pretty simple and honest way. When I was in Junior High, I began to take a sexual interest in women. Thus, I believed that I was bisexual for a long time. That is, until I imagined myself having vaginal sex with a man and literally started crying over it. That was the moment I knew that I could never fathom having a husband or a boyfriend and that my "soul-mate", if there really are such things in this world, would be a woman.<br />
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Just search your own feelings some more and do research. This may require you to stay in the closet for a little while longer, but the knowledge and confidence in yourself will be completely worth it.

I found out I was gay in a pretty simple and honest way. When I was in Junior High, I began to take a sexual interest in women. Thus, I believed that I was bisexual for a long time. That is, until I imagined myself having vaginal sex with a man and literally started crying over it. That was the moment I knew that I could never fathom having a husband or a boyfriend and that my "soul-mate", if there really are such things in this world, would be a woman.<br />
<br />
Just search your own feelings some more and do research. This may require you to stay in the closet for a little while longer, but the knowledge and confidence in yourself will be completely worth it.

I'm having a hard time figuring it out too. I've never kissed a girl. I slept in the same bed with someone i liked and honestly nothing happened because she was asleep. Sometimes i go crazy wondering why i try to hide it but i'm just not ready to say anything because i don't know for sure if i truly like girls. I'm a freshman in college and i'm having the weirdest time trying to figure it all out. I liked this girl in high school and we were thinking about dating after high school but i was going to college 6 hours away from her and so we decided to just be friends. To the same extent, I've never had an actual sexual experience with a guy; and i don't count making out with a guy i didn't even like when i had way too many shots. I am such a late bloomer that i won't at anytime soon be ready for sex. I have a feeling i'm bisexual and in the closet but have no clue what i want. to be honest, i'd like the be with the girl i liked in high school, but i probably won't be able to.