Sanity Is Not Welcome Here

I'm too tired to write.
Everybody calls me crazy in college. They call me insane, psycho, retarded, abnormal. A guy in my class called me a zombie today.
I am bipolar. Tell me is being bipolar abnormal? I've become socially paranoid because of being bullied everyday. I can't even fake a smile anymore in public. I've isolated myself from everyone and everything. Depression takes over every morning because I already know it's going to be a ****** day in college. I have a horrible life, and I've started getting suicidal thoughts. I just don't want to go to college because people look at me weirdly and it drives me crazy. They whisper about me everywhere, they laugh at me. I just want to break down and cry. I'm tired of my life. I try to be as normal as their definition of normal is, but it just makes me look weirder. I just wish I wasn't me, but someone else.
stabbedtoceasersalad stabbedtoceasersalad
18-21, F
3 Responses Jan 14, 2013

You shouldn't let people get to you. Society make people judgmental.

I have been through this. It literally drove me insane, and I'm working on picking up the pieces. However, you must not kill yourself, it will pass eventually. One thing that helps is cutting all ties to anyone that hurt you, and getting a good Solid freind who respects who you are. If you feel yourself break because of deppression, cry about it by yourself. Let out all your emotions, but don't die. This is simply one of the struggles life throws at us. I feel your pain. Good luck.

You can't let other people get you down, even if you've heard it a million times, take it to heart this time. It's hard right now, I have a grasp of knowledge of what you're going through, I really do, think of a bigger, brighter future without the bullying or what crowd you fit into. If you need a friend to be there for you without judgement I've got your back. I've been isolated from basically everyone in my social life because I'm not good enough either but I live everyday knowing in the future I have so much to look forward to such a full and rich life ahead of me!