I'm a Filipino immigrant who just moved here in Canada. I have been residing here for a year now and I would like to express my distaste on what I am going through right now.

First, a few weeks ago I just discovered a way to overcome my separation anxiety (I was really homesick to my country, people and my old way of life) haven't totally recovered but I am doing well.

Second, I'm not sure that I am really insecure about my appearance since I have accepted myself on how I look
(grew up with bad living conditions in a remote area back in PH, also ended up with a scar in the left part of my neck due to surviving an illness and did not have true guidance since my mom is working abroad 95% of the time and my dad died when I was 9)

My communication skills are not that bad too, I now have the skill to hide my accent and have learned how to blend in to the right people.

I accept and understand that I was not blessed and lucky as most people here, but I sometimes find it very ugly for people who judge me and cannot have a pinch of understanding me for who I am and what I've been through. This is why I try not to force myself to people that who do not really like me.

But for the people who are around me right now, people that I call family, cousins and some friends that who I think are fake and also can't get over themselves. I feel lost on what I need to do with the connections I have with them.

I just don't appreciate superficial and fake relationships. I also don't enjoy people who lie to my face. I appreciate it if people would actually tell me that they don't really like me or I am not good looking or whatever it is they need to say in front of my face rather, rather than hearing them saying different things, gossiping, speculating, and sometimes making fun of me behind my back.

I might have placed too much expectations so I'm not really sure what to do next, I have overcome some of my weakness but should I compromise or just burn bridges.

People are not perfect, I know, and morals are expensive. So I shouldn't be expecting too much and should just be better off avoiding them.

Not easy being a FOB.
johnibasco johnibasco
26-30, M
1 Response Aug 15, 2014

why/how are you blending in Canada? its a multicultural country i know a few Filipinos and they have slight accents. No need to hide/blend. you dont like fake people then stop being what you assume a typical canadian is and be yourself.

Thank you for the response,

I'm not going to comment on the typical Canadians since they are usually nice. But it's just the people that are around me, I don't feel like they accept me and I feel out of place sometimes.

I need to get out of depression and just be myself.
Your advice is much appreciated.

im Canadian and suffering from depression. But yeah always be yourself.

hello john. im a filipina.. glad to know onr filipino here in EP