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I Don't Know

  I don't know who I am or why I do things, it really gets on my nerves. I feel so insecure about myself oo, because knowing that I'm such an idiot, I know nobody really likes me and I really am so alone. People say they're they're for me but they're not! They never are.
Wraetheck Wraetheck 16-18, M 3 Responses Nov 7, 2007

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Hi Wraetheck,

As you get older, you will begin to understand what I’m about to say. The most important person in your life is you. You see others as you see yourself. You cannot change others. You can only react to what they do or say. Your reaction depends on who you see yourself as.

When you say, “I don’t know who I am or why I do things,” what you’re really saying is I will not allow myself feelings when they are negative. When you depress, or suppress negative feelings, you cut yourself off from most all of your feelings. Your feelings are a signpost to tell you whether you are pursuing what excites you or not. When you cannot feel you lose direction.

Most of the time, we depress or suppress feelings because were trying to avoid something. Search yourself and see if there’s anything you’re wanting to avoid. When you find that, identify the feelings associated with it, began to acknowledge it even if it is negative and intense, and learn to let it go.

When you do that, you will begin to get a direction in your life. Then, you follow what excites you the most all the time. That keeps your system in line with who you are and what you really want out of life.

Graig :>D

exactly. im so confused all the time. I feel like I'm watching myself live my life, but im not even there.

I'm in your shoes too. I feel like the people who talk to me or claim to be my friends are only faking it because they want something from me. The only thing that gets me though the day is pretending and going along with them. At school I'm bubbly and smiley and laughing all day, but the minute I get home it's like I'm a whole different person. I do everything in my power to try and forget the sadness, and I only ever allow myself a day in the week where I cry and feel sorry for myself. <br />
<br />
Everyone finds someone eventually, we all just have to hold on until they come along <3