Invisible In The Office

I am invisible at the office.  It's an entirely different sort of experience for me.  My clients and customers are friendly and joke and laugh with me but my co-workers, supervisor and other office occupants behave as if I'm not even there.  When they refer to the number of people who work in the office, I'm excluded from the total.  Conversation happens around me and when I do attempt to join the group, my contributions are met with vacant stares.  It's an amazing first time experience.  The longer I work there, the harder I work, the more successful I am, the less I am acknowledged by the people with whom I work. 

CowGirl121 CowGirl121
46-50, F
8 Responses Mar 8, 2010

That's so sad, I'm sorry you are treated so poorly, sometimes you get on with people and sometimes you don't. Just sucks when you have to work with these people daily.

I have a positive, friendly attitude in the office but I do tend to be quiet and focus on my work. My attitude toward my co-workers is no different than it is toward anyone else I meet in a day. I'm friendly. I smile. I try to be supportive and treat everyone with respect and decency. I work extremely hard and am extremely productive. My boss likes that. My co-workers don't. I think there is a mix of jealousy and insecurity. My boss recognizes the behavior and has mentioned it to me. I did not take it to her. In fact, this is the only place I've spoken out about it because it's anonymous and no one come back on me for being negative or whining.

Why do you think your co-workers are treating you the way they do? Is it your attitude towards them? Are you more successful then they are? and are they jealous? Where is your boss in all of this? I don't believe that you have mentioned him/her.<br />
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There has to be a reason for their behavior, I could understand one or two people not associationg with you in your work place, but everyone? WOW

Well, I thought things were getting better but I guess not. It appears that I'm never going to be accepted as a member of the office staff. Yesterday, I was back to being invisible. It was as if a wall went up around my desk. Even though I attempted to engage people in conversation, responses were minimal. I'm starting to put out resumes. It may take a long time to find something else but I work darned hard and do a good job. I don't deserve to be treated like I don't exist.

I wish I could announce some level of progress but I can't, really. It's the most incredible thing. I don't experience this sort of behavior in other places, so I know it isn't me. I did take Dynamite's advice and made another attempt to engage people directly. I'm not going to go away, no matter how much people pretend I don't exist. I need this salary and benefits this job provides. I'm just trying to make my way in the world.

Keep us informed about your progress, or lack there of.

I can certainly try that approach again.

Hey this sucks! <br />
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I noticed that you said YOUR CLIENTS LAUGH AND JOKE with you. So maybe you are the kind of person that takes a back seat, passive approach to conversations. If this is the case, over time your coworkers have probably counted you out because it seemed that that was what you were volunteering to do. <br />
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Tomorrow when you go in be sure to tell everyone good morning, ask how their evenings went and compliment a few people on their behavior or appearance. I bet this will be enough to break the ice that has formed. Even if people don't buy it or know how to react at first...don't even play into it. You create the scene. Just pretend that you believe everyone loves you and wants to talk to you - no mater what reaction you get from them. I am positive that they will follow. Good luck Ex-Invisible!<br />
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You can do it! I believe in you! ((((((hugs)))))))))