I Am Jealous Of My Boyfriends Kid

I am jealous of my boyfriends kid...it sounds ridiculous but It absolutely ****** me off when his kid comes for four days I never get enough time with him alone as it is because he is always working and then his kid comes and i have to share him and the attention isnt even on me its on him and it makes me mad so mad to the point where i dont even really want to be with him anymore I love him but I am not used to not being first i hate being second i dread seeing him at his house while his kid is there i want nothing to do with him or his child when they are together i think the thing that bothers me the most is that he had a child with another girl when they werent even dating so i feel like well where does that put me? i honestly wish he didnt have a kid i cant stand not having his full attention. i find his child annoying i hate it when he is around i dont want to interact with his child anymore when i go over to my boyfriends house when his precious little son is there i sit in the other room by myself i dont want to be around his son what so ever anymore and i feel bad i want all the attention and it makes me feel selfish but maybe i am a bit selfish i was never good with sharing i know if we had kids of our own it would be different and i would be able to cope more because i would have a child but I am 18 years old and i feel like i need to be with someone who can put me before anyone else as i do my boyfriend now and make me number one please i need help on what to do ):
BAbones BAbones
18-21, F
Jan 13, 2013