I'm A Total Newbie Here, So Just Trying To Sort Things Out.

The song is "Changing" by Air Toxic Event. I think it is a great glimpse into that phenomenon where people fall in love (perhaps infatuation would be more accurate, actually) with the person just as they are, with all the quirks and idiosynchracies that make them....them. Sadly, after a period of time, the cute little way he mispronounces nuclear or the adorable way it takes her half an hour to pick out all the food bits she judges inedible out of her salad, just as theoretical examples, become annoying as hell, and the spectre of change rears its ugly head. Each wants to change the other, because in their own minds, each one is still the "catch" the person was lucky enough to find. One lyric part:

"You were just always talking about changing, changing
What if I was the same man, same man
The same I always was"

"Here's my favorite lyric snippet, though. It really hits me viscerrally, naving been in so many relationships that went from princely to pestered almost overnight. From the love of his life, the woman suddenly becomes the audience while he curses the darkness. The lyric pack may pack an extra wallop for me, having been raised as the baby and the only girl in the family and often called by the nickname "Princess," which led, with Disney's omnipresent aid, of course, I think, on a deep level, far too deep for reason, to expect Prince Charming to come along any day now. Just checked. He's still not here. Lyrics ahoy:

Days pass, turn into weeks
When we don't even sleep
We just lay wide awake
And pretend we're asleep.
And you go home alone
And you're checking your phone
And you're looking at me
Like I'm something you own.

It's so sad on so many levels--even on the simplest, because you know at the beginning they probably just couldn't take their eyes off of each other, and every workday seemed like an eternity because they had to be apart. And it ended up here. She's probably checking for better offers on her phone, and he's making conflict avoiding look like an olympic sport.

Sorry if I did this wrong.

Ripening Ripening
46-50, F
Sep 5, 2012