It Has.........Always been my belief that loneliness is something within. A state of mind, if you will allow me to call it such. To me, that feeling is what happens when one is left alone with their thoughts. That odd feeling you get when you are, in a sense, living in your head. That feeling that overwhelms you when you know no one in the very same room as you knows what you're feeling.
You see, i find it hard to relate to most, although for whatever reason- most people love being around me. Now, thats not arrogance talking- its the truth. People in general, love being around me. They find me funny and accepting. Its easy to talk to me. I will always lend you an ear or a shoulder to lean on.
The irony of it all is that most of the time, i dont feel like anyone can relate to me. I may be wearing a smile and making jokes while playing the drunk girl. the girl that just showed up at your house high. But, they've no idea whats going on in my head.
Some call me arrogant. When i get into my quiet phases. But, im so far from that......... Some chalk it all up to me being drunk or high. But, in reality? Im really analyzing every single person in the room. I cant help it.
Sure i can spend time off of this PC and go off and hangout with my "friends". I can go back and party like i used to. But, whats really the point? Either way, none of them get me like some do on this site. Sad, no? That a group of people whom i never met know me far more than the people that surround me everyday.
ha! Its funny in a way......... the roles that we play. The things that no one else will get to know about me.