Does Anyone Care?

if you dont care, stop reading and dont post anything.

please keep in mind: i am 14.

i dont understand. i am dont appear, even to myself, to be lonely. but i am. i cant get over this over-whelming feeling that im not worth anything to anyone and that noone cares, no matter how much they say they do. i cant seem to truly trust anyone because i know they are just a mask. I cant seem to make true freinds with anyone because i dont want to burden them with my pains. i feel i am too strong for my own good. i dont understand why i cant get over this. ive been like this for as long as i can remember. ive never had a close friend, ever. and i dont feel like i can share my feelings with anyone that i see. i feel like it would be too much weight on their shoulders or that they would just reject me completely. i feel lost. i stumble and i fall. and though i get back up, i always feel defeated. never able to stand up for myself, and when i do, i just get stomped down back onto the floor. i hide this with anger, aggression, and through the arts:drawing, singing, acting,etc. please tell me what im doing wrong or how i can solve this early. thank you for caring enough to read this, and especially if you care enough to comment.

booanater booanater
13-15, F
Mar 14, 2010