Married and Lonley

I was in a marriage like that when I was young and still healthy enough to walk away. As it turned out, he had to ask for the divorce before I finally left. I don't know why I thought a man who didn't want to speak to me was worth waiting around for, but that's what happened. I'm grateful it has been over now for 23 years. I live alone and am isolated but that is due to the disability and illness. When you're with someone who is "supposed to" love and cherish you and you feel that deep yaw of loneliness, it doesn't make sense. And it hurts FAR worse. When I get lonely now, I know WHY! It's because I need some human contact, which I then go about getting usually by phone, sometimes face to face.

My thoughts are with you.

Hi, nobodyz. I am sorry that your husband is treating you that way. My heart goes out to you. God cares about your situation and to Him you are very important and loved by Him. I recieve social security also for a disability and I have very few friends so I know what it means to be isolated. Continue to try to be outgoing yourself and you will be more able to make friends-Jesus loves you more than I can tell you. Take care.

My husband is very similar. I am also invisable to his parents and kids. Glad to hear your getting a degree. I do work a part time job but I don't find it very fullfilling.The best thing is at least I have people to talk to when I am working. You can't have conversation with somone who doen't want it. Good luck

I feel your pain..............I was there too, except my husband is a good guy with depression issues. He didn't want to do anything, didn't like hanging with family, having friends or having a married social life with other couples. We talked, but it stopped being intimate a very long time ago. I was hoping he would come out of it but he decided for a seperation. And divorce is very likely in the very near future. I was lonely then, and I'm very lonely now. You are in my prayer.......

My dear, raise your head up. Miracle can happened but NOT WITH HIM.

Look yourself, make your self pretty inside and outside. Go out. Find a light.. Live... live.. breath easy... Get happy, get busy, fall in love... WAKE WAKE WAKE! Shake your self... There is a lot of wonderful thing out there. Go and GRAB THEM. Don't be a lonely, life will go either you are sad or happy. So GET YOUR CHANCE RIGHT NOW. Move!

I agree with Diamond. When I read the word disability.. can someone tell me how disable is 'disable' in this context ?? What disability can caused a person to stay alone and wait for the man to talk/to love/to hold and to made love with? I am not being cruel here so please dont' get me wrong. I do feel for every human being here who is in the I Am Lonely Group. I am one of you all as well so I do understand the word lonely BUT....Why do you pick to stay home to be in front of the pc when you can go out and know more friends in person rather that this screen here?? It doesn't need to cost you a bom to meet new friends if you are having financial difficulty.

I personally see that with the technology these days, so many people are reluctant and rather prefer to stay in front of the pc. Not only adults...children as well.

So do yourself a favour.. GO OUT! Dont' get addicted to frens on PC. Some of them might not be real..some will make you feel so love but at day end...they might not be.

So stand up today. Dont' moan about being LONELY cos only YOURSELF can make this LONELY GO AWAY. Nobody can help you to stand up and move unless you want to.

Chin up everyone.. Be tough.

p/s: If you ever wonder why I am writing this long.. have a go on my stories and you will know I am no better than anyone of you all that is lonely but I won't let the word lonely haunt me to the extend I lost myself... We have to wake up ...

Loneliness is a terrible thing. What did people do before there were online networking places like this to wile away the hours (conferring with the flowers hahaha), learning new things, talking to old friends (FACEBOOK), distracting ourselves from our pain. Sorry, pain needs a distraction.

Life is often a rollercoaster ride, all we can do is just hang on and try to relax as much as we can.

Times being what they are, recession wise, we all have a lot of worries at least we do over here.

Again, loneliness sucks. Distract yourself. Thanks for your comment on your loneliness. We all deal with it at some time or another in our lives.

I totally relate to your story in so many ways! I'm not disabled but I am a stay at home mom who doesn't have a licence and who is currently immigrating to the US so I can't work until my work permit is approved, so in a big and real way I am dependent on my husband! And for an independent person it makes it really hard on me!

Then to be ignored, avoided and b*tched at by the one person who is supposed to support and love me unconditionally, well that just plain hurts! I empathize with you so much, I feel like we're in very similar situations.

That being said, I can't physically leave my husband right now (according to both a divorce lawyer and my immigration lawyer) so I am actually stuck, are you? Don't you want more for yourself? I know I do! And I want my son to learn that it's important to want the best for yourself because if you don't stand up for yourself no one else will! So if you can leave, or start saving, do it and look forward to the freedom that will come with being able to find a person who will truly love and appreciate you because you are so worth it, but no one else will fight for you if you don't fight for yourself first!

I think you need to start saying what you what YOU want and why you're not happy to HIM & keep saying it until it sinks in. Most men need the changes needed spelt out to them. Not in a nagging way, but in a loving, want-to-spend-time-together way. The relationship is in a rut but needs you both to take time to talk & make the changes. Whatever the changes are depend on what you BOTH say you really HONESTLY want. Ask him to be totally honest, if he's depressed, if he just doesn't feel the same anymore etc. If he refuses to cooperate in discussing anything with you despite you patiently trying regularly, then it's possible you may have to accept he does not want a real relationship again with you. If he doesn't, you don't have to waste any more of your time or let him waste it.

I wish you all the best :o)

So why don't you leave him then, I no it's easier said then done, but it's better then dying slowly...