Loneliness Kills Me...

All i wanted is someone to love & care about me, but what i get is loneliness in return. Even when i'm surrounded by everyone, i feel so lonely. I can't feel any love even though the person that i love is near me. What is happening to me? i was in a relationship for 2 years...everything went well till a few months ago. He was having an affair with his ex-girlfriend. I found out after 2 months. After that, he say that he realize his mistakes & want to start over again but i don't feel the same love anymore. I can't forget what he did to me. I still love him a lot but can't show it to him. I feel lonely & empty even though he is next to me. This feeling is really killing me! Can't let him go but at the same time can't be happy with him. What bad karma did i do, do deserve this? Would he be okay if i did the same thing to him? I can't even betray him even in my dreams. Sometimes i feel like want to disappear from this earth.End all my miseries. Is there true love still exist is this world or its all about lying, betrayal & selfishness only are here.
shailugurl shailugurl
26-30, F
3 Responses May 20, 2012

Nobody said betrayal is easy. Especially if u love ur partner. It is shocking, creates anger and resentment and might hit ur self-esteem and value of urself. It would be normal if this happens to u. But it doesnt mean u are the person u think u are. All kinds of pain need a process to heal. First, u got to work on urself. regain self-esteem and confidence and know it is not ur fault. U should not show weakness or unhappiness to him . But show u are confident and happy with ur daily life, kind to him but not as at ease as before and he will wonder how much u love him. U will turn the tables and he will try harder to work it out like before. Then u decide if u want him back or not. Do not take any decision on anger or depression or do the mistake of letting anyone influence u. When ure ready, U do what u feel like doing, and think how it would be like with or without him, take ur time for this. All men stray, hardly there are a few who dont.

Even if a million people read this and comment on this, you already know what people will say. He cheated on you, you can't trust him and he is not trying to repair the relationship. Everyone will tell you to leave him but it is up to you. Its easier to stick to something that you already know and always harder to do something new. Your use to a life with him and maybe it scares you that leaving him will turn your life upside down and the truth is that it will. You already know what I am going to say to do, but it comes down to you. So if your gonna comment back and say thing like I can't, I love him, he means so much to me, then enjoy your life and stop wasting our time if your not gonna take the advice. Unless he is trying, come back and ask us how can you make a clean break and run for the hills. Ask how badly will it hurt, ask how long before life seems normal again. Its always easy to live in the routine, its hard to break it and start new.

Hey....i guess u should first think that what u actually need frm this relationship...whether u r happy with him...if he is able to live upto ur expectations.... If u trust him completely...i m sure by looking into all d points that u think are lacking in ur relationship...u can make things work....good luck :)

I'm scared to trust him completely...
He is not taking any move to repair our relationship but making it worse by fighting without reasons..

In that case...i think u should directly talk to him about how u feel....if he understands...that means he loves u n if he over reacts or gets irritated....let him go.... See...i know its difficult to let him go though...but remember...everything happens for good...just be prepared for the worst....n hope for d best.... Live for urself....if he makes u happy...fine...otherwise...move on for urself..... Dont let ego come between both of u but at d same time....dont lose ur self respect....i hope everything gets fine soon....!!!