The Wholesome Loner

I am 14, 3 best friends, more than 10 other friends. Sounds like I have the perfect social life, right?
Wrong. I am lonely. Completely lonely. I have 2 girls whom I can rely on some times living in front of my building. But whether they are hesitant or what I don't understand. 
I spend my summer vacation days now, reading, writing a story occasionally, sketching, surfing online or watching TV. From childhood I have been what I call 'self-sufficient'. I did have many friends in my early age of childhood. After I shifted there was no one to socialize with as I had withdrawn in my own shell as I was getting bullied and turning into a teenager.
After that I had a gang of friends from my school. We were notorious for being talkative and played pranks. Summers before this one I used to I have my cousin sister over. We both gossiped and had fun.
I have adjusted to being lonely. I have built  rich fantasy worlds around myself. I don't have a social life.
I am socially awkward and even have a little  schizoid personality disorder. 
I don't know why I am writing this but it feels as though something is turning me inside out and something is going to burst inside me.
LonelyAngel5471 LonelyAngel5471
13-15
May 24, 2012