The Accident That Became -me !

The title does say it all -in 1960 yes I was an accident not intentional and as my life became more of me, it would teach more and more that I was, not wrong in that understanding . There were many signs along the way but like a puzzle ,you cant see enough of the picture until most the pieces are put in place -and with only piece left I do see the whole picture and I must say I could have never dream early on, how very different my road was going to become . I am a lover of the truth (all truth) I have always, been that way I love to understand how things work and what makes them work that intrigues me constantly -my mind is always working on that level and never quits I seem to be some kind of living computer always needing data . So recently I turn that curious mind to a question that has nagging me from the beginning of my life -to know the truth of what and why I am here in this life . To answer that question took some time and some luck as well (it took 3 yrs) to learn the honest truth did I like the answer -No but I expected it not be normal ,as all the rest of my life has been not normal either. As people or as human beings we do not understand how we can make such terrible choices in life until they are made and life it self was a choice made for us that is how we arrive here and those choices can be very hurtful and leave people wondering and asking simple questions like me -why am I here? To know the truth is sometimes better not too it can cause enough pain to end your life and that is not a good choice to make , but I had to know my truth and when I found it even I ,could not dream of such a truth ! I learned my Identity was never what I was told by my mother she could not bring herself to tell me face to face the terrible and immature choices she made at 16 and by those choices she entered a hurricane that would shape her life and my destiny . She was like any teenager of today with no direction in her life such as , job ,schooling or college she was bored of the hard life she was living in those days and wanted something more and she used the only thing she had her, sexuality to get what she wanted . But as I said that choice changed all of her choices down her road and forever locked into a life she really did not want the rest of my story is immaterial because it was for me to know the truth and I found it . I know you who will read this would say -No you were not an accident because God purposed you to be here - that maybe , but our choices as humans can create a misfortune for those who are not here yet and not be fair to them at all ! So please by all means consider your choices in life much more carefully before you make them .
deleted deleted
26-30
2 Responses Sep 10, 2012

god makes no mistakes. You are a miracle of GOD

we are are the effect of something happened in the past a few years ago i was told by my bothers that my mother said when she was diying that i was not the product of her maragge but of a person that raped her as she made a mild drop of for my fathers dad i do not know for sure other then i was never wanted or loved by them but eyt they said it was do to my twin being born dead and they wanted a girl<br />
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i have no family conatanct really and have not had for years really sense i left home at 12 years old<br />
i did call my sister a few years ago and ask her the name of the guys she was dating for a nice word that was a USMC recuter and she ask me why and i told her and she hung up on me<br />
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if i could proved she had anythiong to do t-with the *** hole our mother married in 1965 there would be a price to pay as some how my wife got in the usmc and was killed on 1/14/1967<br />
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she was only 4foot 8 and less then 100 lbs it took me a years to get a wavier on wetting to join the service byt yet she had none on her records <br />
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allk we were ever told was somme onehad furnished paper work thatw as false and they had been dealt wit